Why are You Here?
by LaCoeurdelaMer
Summary: Ia is troubled and needed to be back with the crew. So she is! Still the adorably insane egotistical mainiac as last time! Gotta love her! Please read! And review! :D I LOVE MOUNTAIN DEW!
1. Winter Carnival Gone Wrong

Ok... this is my revision of Why are you Here?

I decided to revise the entire thing! Why? I didn't really like it...I couldn't control it! Ok... here it is!

Chapter One

Ia (17) was walking down Arch Street wearing her purple Dragon shirt, her mom's brown boots, and her tan skirt. She also had her blue jacket and her bookbag and winter hat on. The one that looks like a Fireworks explosion on her head. Her older sister hated it with a passion.

Also with her was Skie (18), wearing jeans and her boaring grey sweatshirt since she was being boaring and not dressing up for Extreme Day for Winter Carnival. The ironic thing is that WC is going on during the warmest week in February. Funny, no?

Zac, Carl, and Chey were also there. Chey in this beautiful dress, Zac in his usual artier, Carl too.

"Carl! Go away! Girl talk!" Skie yelled as Ia, Chey and she walked down the sidewalk covered in melting brownish snow.

Carl obeyed and started chasing Zac again with the perfect snowballs. You know? The snow is meltish and is very wet so it sticks better. Better than powder, at least.

"What did he say!" Skie pestered Chey again.

"I'll tell you when we get to the bottom!" Chey said as the passed the small car dealership on the corner of Arch and Teal Lake Avenue.

They crossed at a run trying to do a Carl where you run across the street nearing a car. But no cars were there at the time.

Chey divulged herself to Skie and Ia watched Carl chase Zac with snow again and narrated it like Steve Irwin (RIP).

"There goes the rare Fairy Boy! Only one left in captivity! Being chased by the mortal enemy from the begning of time, The Carl!" she said in a Irwin accent, holding up her hands as if holding a camera. "There are only... bout... three left in the world I assume?" Ia said as Chey and Skie started laughing at either side of her. They could see Zac in the distance. Disgruntled as ever. No sign of Carl.

Chey left to go to Lakeview to catch the bus with her little brothers and Ia and Skie trecked up the hill after saying a good bye to Oni-Chan. The pun is that he's younger than the trio.

Skie and Ia talked about melting snow and the little street rivers that they loved so much.

The went home blah blah blah and Ia turned on the kitchen TV and started eating Cheese Nips.

T-A-K-E-M-E-H-O-M-E-C-O-U-N-T-R-Y-R-O-A-D

She woke the next morning to find that her picture of Sanji had fallen off the wall where it was next to Jack Sparrow. It was him posed just like the Jack Sparrow poster. She smiled and put it back on the wall hoping the tape would stay this time or she would probably shoot somebody.

She put on her rockstar jeans with a kid-like shirt since it was what Chey's cousin would call, Pedofile Day (Dress Like a Kid Day)!

At round 7:05, she finaly got out the door and to go to school.

It was warmish today. She unzipped her jacket and tried to remember if she had all her homework.

"You're disturbed, arn't you."

"What the hell?" Ia said as she turned around to see who said something.

"Uh hm. So true. You need to see them again, don't you."

"Where are you? Who are you? Why are you here?"

"I'm your subconscious. Look up." they yelled.

Ia looked up and saw a small person about the size of her mechanical pencil. She was wearing jeans and a brown shirt and had angle wings on her back.

"What the hell." Ia said as the little person dropped down to eye level.

"Ya. You need them. You need to see them. I can tell!"

"What are you talking about?"

"Mugiwara." she whispered.

"The crew."

"Crew! That's the one! Crew! Come on! I'll help you. Just come down this here alley!"

"NO."

The little person looked very irate. She held up her hand and snapped her fingers.

A red van suddenly veerd up onto the curb and past King Koin Laundromat and blared up to Ia...

E-Y-E-O-F-T-H-E-T-I-G-E-R

Luffy was running down the street, looking for meat (no duh). The middle of the street was pretty clear and Luffy stood in the middle, hoping to see a meat stall when a girl with short black hair appeared in front of him flying through the air and towards Luffy. He caught her before she knocked him over.

"Nani?" he said and looked at the girl with pigtails.

"SANJI! IT'S IA!"

* * *

I will update this... soon... I hope... maybe... eh...

2-21-07


	2. Sheeeeeeee's Back!

Hi-oh! It's a friken blizzard outside and I decided to write this... either that or watch Monk...

Since I couldn't update yesterday... (it would have been nice, seeing as it was a Snow Day) i'll update this morning. 6:55 Am???

Chapter Two

Luffy dragged Ia all the way to the ship. Once on the dock, he picked her up wedding style and jumped on board.

"Luffy! Use the ladder!" Nami yelled.

"Look!" he said and put Ia on the deck.

"Ia's back? Why is she unconscious?"

Luffy shrugged.

"Where is Chopper?" Nami asked.

"I'm right here, Nami."

"Good, could you come down here?"

Chopper came down from the upper deck and ran towards them.

"What is it?" he asked and then saw Ia. "AHHH! WE NEED A DOCTOR! SHE'S HURT!"

"You are a doctor."

"Oh... right!" he said, embarrassed. "Ok..." he said as he started checking her.

"Where's Sanji?"

"Getting us some supper." Nami said.

"Wait till he sees her!" Luffy cried.

I-N-T-H-E-M-O-O-D

Sanji walked down the street with a ginormus fish on his shoulder. He lit a cigaret and out of the corner of his eye he saw sauce that he could use when making this huge fish. Was it salmon?

Sanji walked up to the ship and up the ladder. He then saw Zoro, Usopp, Nami, Luffy, and Chopper around something he couldn't see.

"What are you doing?" Sanji ask and walked over. Usopp and Nami moved over so Sanji could see. Ia.

Sanji didn't say anything. He couldn't believe it...

"RED VAN GONNA HIT ME!" Ia suddenly screamed. Everybody freaked out and jumped back a step. She started freaking out and didn't really realize that she was on the Going Merry. She suddenly grabbed her right wrist and looked at her watch. 9:15 AM. "Holy frick... I'M LATE FOR SCHOOL! I SHOULD BE IN BAND RIGHT NOW! IT'S SECOND HOUR! WHAT THE HELL? WHERE AM I!?" she screamed suddenly.

"Ia... are you ok?" Usopp asked.

She looked around and suddenly realized where she was.

"I'm completely fine! Does Chopper say I have any broken limbs cuz that wouldn't be a mystery. I just got hit by a van and somehow ended up... oh no... where is she!" Ia yelled.

"Who?" everybody asked.

"Nevermind... I'll kill her later. So... any broken?" she asked Chopper.

"No."

"No?"

"Yes."

"Yes!"

"No."

"Yes?"

"NO!"

"No?"

Chopper looked pretty angry so she decided to drop it.

She realized that she was getting really really hot so she took off her book bag, jacket, and grey sweatshirt.

"How is everybody?" Zoro asked.

Ia looked at him with confusion but then said, "Fine. Nothing's really changed."

"Oh... could I talk to you, over here?" he said.

"Sure." she said and got up, swaggered a bit and followed him to the stern.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Is... is Chey seeing anyone?" he asked.

"Chey... really! Wow... um no. I think guys are afraid of her and weirded out that she's in total love with a manga character. But I do know who she has a crush on!"

"Who." he asked, evil gleam in his eye.

"I'm sworn to secrecy." she said, holding up her pinky.

"Why do you have your pinky up?"

"We pinky-promised." she said.

"Damn." Zoro muttered.

_Wow... didn't know Zoro cared so much for Chey... she should be pretty happy! To bad I can't tell her... _Ia thought.

Ia walked over to the crew and said, "I'm hungry."

Sanji looked ecstatic.

* * *

This is the end of this chapter! Rant and Rave, please! Chey, Zoro cares for you. Happy. .

2-25-07


	3. Singing Tears

Here you go... happy!? .

This is where I got to in my old crappy one. Enjoy Please!

Chapter Three

Ia woke up the next morning thinking she was late for school, but disregarded it when she smelled the ocean spray.

She dressed back in her clothes from yesterday and went up to the kitchen where she found everybody.

"Hey." she said as she went in.

"Morning, Ia-Swan!" Sanji said.

Ia sat down and pulled out her book, _The Second Summer of the Sisterhood_.

"Here you are!" Sanji said and put a plate of food in front of her.

"Thanks." she said and started eating.

Luffy eyed her food with longing.

"Don't even think about it, Luffy." Ia said from behind her book.

"What?"

"I heard you, you can not and will not eat my food." she said and lifted it into the air.

Sanji watched her and though of something.

"Ia, how are you doing that?"

"What do you mean? You saw me eat the Devil's Fruit last time."

"Ya... but I have your necklace." he said and took it out of his jacket pocket.

Ia stared at it.

"Oh my God... I forgot about it... I guess I could do it the entire time..." she said.

"Oh."

"FRICK!" she suddenly yelled.

"What?" Zoro yelled.

"I can't swim."

"You didn't know that?" Zoro said flatly.

"No. I knew that! I can swim in my own world... just not here." she said bitterly.

Everybody stared at her.

She got mad and glared at them all and left, leaving her half-eaten breakfast.

C-A-N-T-D-R-I-V-E-5-5

She sat on the stairs and read most of the day.

"Ia?"

She looked up and saw Nami standing next to her.

"Ya?" she said.

"What's up with you?" she asked, sitting down.

"Nothing." she said a little sharply.

Nami gave her a look.

"What about." she said, a little softer than before.

"You're a bit... sharper."

"So!" she snapped and realized what she meant. "Oh." she said quietly.

"You should work on that." she said and got up and left. Ia gave her a dark look, as always.

S-T-I-C-K-S-A-N-D-S-T-O-N-E-S

By mid afternoon, Ia had gotten board of reading so she decided to walk around.

"Luffy, what are you doing?" she asked, looking at Luffy hanging over the edge of the ship.

"Trying to grab the fish!" he said. Ia looked over and saw a ginormus school of fish. Bright red ones.

Luffy stretched his arm down to the water and tried to grab a fish but whenever that happened, the fish would swarm away but then come back when he brought his arm back up.

Ia left.

She walked around and got board, she gets board very easily. She's not very good at entertaining herself. Eventually, she sat down at the stern and started singing to herself.

"_One foot on the break, and one on the gas. Well there's too much traffic, I can't pass no. Well I've tried my best illegal move. Baby, black and white, go and touch my groove again! _

"_Go on and write me up for 125! Post my face, wanted dead or alive! Take my license, all that jive. I can't drive 55!"_

"IA! You can sing?" Luffy yelled, coming up from the lower deck.

"Yes." she said.

"Sing something else!"

"I don't like singing in front of people. I've only done it once before, like on my own. That's the one exception." she said.

"Please!" he begged, O.O

"No." she said.

"What were you singing?"

"C-" she said but heard her name being called. "Be right back." she said and left.

D-A-N-C-I-N-G-Q-U-E-E-N

Ia walked around and saw Sanji waiting for her near the bow.

"Ya, Sanji?" she asked, walking up.

"Who's Cam?" he asked.

Ia's eyes got bigger. He must have over heard when she told Nami about her boyfriend.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, who's Cam?"

"N-nobody!" she said. She didn't want Sanji to think that she is dumping him.

"I heard what you told Nami!" he shouted. It was kinda scary.

"Oh." she said.

"Ya. Who is he? I want to know!"

"If you must know... he's... a friend of mine!" she said, trying to keep herself from loosing it.

"_Boy_friend!?"

"Sorta?"

Sanji was silent.

"Sanji?"

"WE'RE THROUGH!" he yelled.

Ia felt like a spear went through her gut and stole her organs. She felt as if her mind would ever work again. She didn't even need to see if he was lying. She knew.

She spun on her heal and marched down to her room. She was good at keeping her tears at bay till she had to let them out.

Once she reached where she slept, she fell on it and within two minutes her pillow was soaked.

* * *

3-14-07 My 3-Monthaversery! Be happy for me... not Ia 


	4. Do I love you?

Here you are! Chapter 4!

Chapter Four

Ia was silent for a long time. The crew wondered if her voice was still there.

Occasionally, she was seen with red puffy eyes or shiny cheeks. But those times were growing smaller and smaller.

"Ia. I can't stand it anymore!" Nami said once they reached an island. "I'm buying you some clothes!"

Ia's face brightened up and she followed Nami into the town.

Sanji had been waiting for a time when he was sure Ia couldn't interupt.

E-L-C-U-M-B-A-N-C-H-E-R-O

He paced the kitchen.

How could I have done that to her?" he asked himself. "I love her... don't I?"

The silly girl he had fallen in love with a year ago was now the serious girl he was now falling in love with.

Two different girls. He felt he couldn't leave the old Ia for fear she might, once again, appear. The new Ia was complicated and to herself. He loved them both but how?

M-O-N-T-E-R-O

Ia and Nami walked into a store and Nami instantly went and grabbed an outfit.

"Try it!" she said and ushered Ia into a dressing room.

A while later (a couple of minutes, really), Ia came out and stood in front of the mirror.

"Well?" Nami asked, not expectiong a response.

Ia stared at herself and, "I look like fricken Daisy Duke!" she yelled.

Nami was suprised. Not so much that she didn't like it, but that she spoke.

"Wait... who?"

"Daisy Duke," she was wearing a top like Daisy Duke and an extreamly short skirt. "She dresses like this."

"Oh. You don't like it?"

"No." she said, walking into the dressing room.

"Hey, why weren't you talking?"

There was silence on the other side.

"Ia?"

"Reasons. Concerning Sanji."

"What are they?"

Ia started muttering gibberish.

"IA!"

"He dropped it on me." she said.

"That doesn't sound like Sanji to me."

"WELL HE DID!" she snapped.

"Ok!" Nami said in defense.

"Have anything else?"

N-O-O-N-E

Sanji was sitting in the crows nest, smoking, when Nami and Ia came up the road. They were in a conversation, as Sanji could see.

"Ia?" Sanji said as they girls came up onto deck. Ia completely ignored him.

After supper that night, Sanji stood on deck, staring at the sunset.

"Sanji?"

Sanji turned around and saw Luffy behind him.

"You just ate."

"No... Ia told me to tell you that... waite...oh ya! It's all your fault, you insensitive jerk."

Sanji looked away, taking this to heart.

"Ia! Sanji said nothing!" Luffy said.

"You're killing him, you know that." Nami said.

"He deserves it." she lied.

"Ia! You're evil."

"I know- ya. I am." she said quietly.

She sat there in silence. Why was she torturing him like this? Was it her evil nature. Did she love him?

K-N-O-W-W-H-O-I-A-M

They reached another island, they had to stop for food.

Ia watched as Sanji walked into the crowd.

Sanji turned around quickly to see if Ia was there, and walked off.

Kinda short... ah well... All's well that ends well. That does not even GO for this chapter??!?

* * *

3-17-07 Happy St. Patrick's Day! 


	5. Fruity Pirates

Hey! Here it is again! This isn't as dramatic as the last ones...

My dad's going insae about the B-Ball game going on. Negaunee Miner's vs Houghton Gremlins he's yelling all over the place... kinda scary.

Chapter Five

Luffy and Ia scanned the deck and snuck into the kitchen.

Ia barred the door as Luffy snuck some food.

"Thanks, Ia!" he said.

"Shh! You're welcome!" she said.

The darkness started disappearing quickly as they made their way dow to their rooms, hoping not to wake anybody.

Ia made it into her and Nami's room when, "Where were you?" Nami asked, groggily.

"Bathroom." she lied quickly. She seemed to be doing that a lot lately.

H-O-T-E-L-C-A-L-I-F-O-R-I-N-I-A

A small girl ran down the crowded street with a big bundle in her arms covered in a towel.

The Mugiwara were stopped at that island and Ia was walking around on her own when the little girl smacked into her.

"Are you ok?" Ia asked after her 'Frick-athon'.

"Yes, I'm fine!" she said in a kinda British accent.

"Oh. That's good." she said, getting up.

"THAT'S MINE!" she yelled when Ia picked up the bundle.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Ah... you can have it!" she siad smiling like Ia when she did something evil. Ia didn't notice.

"Why? You just made this entire snip about it being yours." Ia said, but the girl was gone. "What the hell is this thing anyway?" Ia asked, unwrapping it. A giant blue raspberry was shown. Ia's eyes became huge and gleaming. She ate it, being a complete reete.

I-T-S-N-O-T-O-V-E-R

Sanji took the food he bought and went back to the ship.

"Where's Ia?" Luffy asked.

"She's not back?" Sanji asked.

"RUN!" somebody screamed.

They all looked around and saw Ia running down the raod with about 100 large guys, most likely pirates, chasing her with clubs and swords. Your typical pirate.

She sprinted onto the boat and pushed it from the dock... but not with her mind?

"OH my God... I CAN MOVE WATER!? HOLY FRICK!"

"What did you do this time?" Zoro asked.

"Well... this little girl gave me this-"

"The Pirates!"

"Oh, well, I ate this and they started chasing me. It was pretty retarded."

"What do they want?" Nami asked.

"I'll ask em!" Ia said and ran over to the edge. "WHY ARE YOU CHASING ME!?" she screamed.

"YOU ATE OUR FRUIT!"

She smiled guiltly and said, "So that's what I ate!" she said and laughed guiltily.

Everybody but Luffy glared at her. Luffy just said, "COOL!"

"That's not cool! We've got pirates chasing us because Ia's to stupid to actually look at what she's eating!" Nami yelled.

"I know what I ate!"

J-I-T-T-E-R-B-U-G

The crew spent that night 20 feet from the dock. The pirates had pitched tents and sleeping bags where they were.

"They're not gonna let me go." Ia said.

"Why don't we just give them you and leave?" Zoro asked.

Ia and Sanji glared at Zoro but when Ia looked at Sanji, he stopped.

"Can't we just sail off?" Usopp said.

"Ya! Let's go!" Chopper said.

"NO! They'll just follow us."

"What could they possibly do?"

Ia went into her classic thinking pose where her head cocked to the left and she looked up through the corner of her right eye.

"Let's just sail off!" Nami said.

"Oh ya... they couldn't do that." Ia muttered and stood up and went out on deck.

She stared at them and saw a little fire going on in the center. Green eyes.

'Why did we chase her?'

'She ate our fruit.'

'Oh ya. What are we gonna do to her?'

'We chased her to scare the hell out of her and that crew!'

'That it.'

'Yes.'

"WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO IN THE MORNING!?" Ia screamed.

"ABSOLUTELY NOTHING-... DAMN YOU! YOU MADE ME TELL MY PLAN!"

"WELL WHEN YOU ARE TALKING SO DARN LOUD, I ALREADY KNEW YOUR PLAN! I WASN'T SCARED!"

"YES YOU WERE! WE SAW YOU!"

"Damn. SO WHAT?"

"HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!"

Ia turned around to their laughing and lifted her hand. A giant wave of water spilled over all of them, washing most of them into the sea.

She smirked evilly to herself and went to bed.

* * *

Quick ending...

Rant and Rave!

3-17-07 Happy St. Patrick's Day :D


	6. Lovey Scrubs

I'm soooooo sorry but this is gonna be a pretty long chapter. I am unable to stretch it into chapter seven cuz I just can't... alright? Good Lord.

Oh... you know the game my dad was freaking out over? Well... WE LOST BY ONE POINT! THOSE CRAPPY GREMLINS ARE -censored on a censored sandwhich- sorry about that...

Chapter Six

Ia looked around. She was in a hospital.

"What the Frick?"

"You alright, Elliot?"

Ia slowly looked around and saw... Zoro?

"Zoro?"

"Uh... Elliot? Are you envisioning me as some sexy guy who can make a Z with his sword?"

"What?" she yelled.

"I'm Turk. Just so you know." he said and walked off.

Ia had her mouth agape and cocked her head to the side. She looked upset.

"Something bothering you, Dr. Reed?" Ia turned around and saw Dr. Kelso.

"I'm fine." she said and he went off. "Oh my God..." she said and started walking down the hall.

"Elliot!" she heard someone shout from behind her. She turned around and there was Sanji.

"Uh..." she said.

"J.D.? Elliot, you said you were going to meet me for lunch? What happened?"

"I... lost track of time." she said. He nodded and went off. "What the Frick... I'm in Scrubs... but I'm Elliot... well, that is ado. But...please no." she said and started walking.

"Anybody seen Dr. Cox?" Ia asked.

"Ya. He's down at the Nurse's Station." some random intern said.

Ia ran down the hall and saw Nami, Skie, and...

"Zac?" she asked.

The man turned around and sure enough, it was her best friend, Zac. But...

"Barbie, I'm Dr. Cox. If you can't get that straight, I don't know what you can do." he said and walked off.

"Elliot, try not to get on Cox's last nerve. He's already ticked off as it is." Nami said.

"Carla?" she asked.

"Ya."

"Lavern?"

Skie nodded.

"Oooookay... eh... what time is it?"

"1:00, why?"

Ia ran off.

G-O-Y-O-U-R-O-W-N-W-A-Y

What the frick was going on? Why was she at Sacred Heart.

"Hey, Elliot!" Mark said. No, he was Todd.

"Hey, Dr. Reed!" some intern said.

"Wait... what episode is this?" she asked herself. She thought about something.

"Elliot!" J.D. said from behind her.

She turned around and her stomach did a flip turn. Ah! J.D. was so adorable when he walked down the hall in his blue scrubs. What?

"Hey... J.D. What'ch ya want?" she asked, sticking her hands in her coat pockets.

"Have you seen Turk? I want to know how Roudie's doing." he said.

"Haven't seen him. I'm looking for him too." she said, shaking a bit.

"Oh," he said. "Maybe he's in the lounge." he said and walked down the hall, Ia followed.

They walked in and saw Zoro-Turk talking on his cell phone.

"Who's he talking to?" Janitor- Cam asked.

"His wife." J.D. said as Nami-Carla came in, looking for a patient's chart and walked out when she took it.

"I'll talk to you soon, bye!" Turk said and hung up.

"Wait... were you talking to your old girlfriend from college?" J.D. asked.

"Ya! Rosette!"

"Chey." Ia muttered to herself.

"Ooo! Who's this?" Janitor-Cam asked.

"Why are you in here?" J.D. asked.

"Nothing else to do? Plus I'm trying to see if you would sit in that piece of gum I placed on the coffee table. It worked!" Janitor-Cam said, leaving. J.D. stood up and there was a long bright pink gum line connecting him to the table.

"Ah man!" he said.

I-M-N-O-T-T-H-A-T-G-I-R-L

Ia sat alone in the cafeteria. Carla-Nami came up.

"Elliot, what's the matter?"

"I don't know. I think I still like J.D."

"But you broke up, didn't you?"

"Yes. We did. But I can't get him out of my mind." she said. Sounding just like Elliot.

"Well, I'm getting a bit annoyed with Turk that he's talking to his ex."

"Wait... you're jealous?"

"NO! I'm not jealous!"

Ia gave her a look of 'ya right'.

"Alright... I'm a little jealous. Happy?"

"No. I would be if I had this huge chocolate cake with my name on it an San-"

"J.D.?" Carla-Nami asked.

Ia was silent. She started sputtering until she said, "NO!"

"Mmm hum." Carla-Nami said, with a smirk on her face.

"Ok!"

"You just said that you miss him?"

"Sure." she said.

Carla-Nami gave Ia-Elliot a soft look. "It's ok that you miss him, Elliot. You're relationship ended so suddenly... I'm suprised that you haven't broken down crying!"

This was untrue. Ia had broke down crying a couple times.

"Ya."

S-P-E-A-K-F-O-R-M-Y-S-E-L-F

Ia walked down the hall with a sad look on her face. She suddenly heard music start and the people around her made no notice of it.

"What the Frick?" she said.

_And I'd give up forever to touch you. Cuz I know that you feel me somehow. You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be and I don't want to go home right now. And all I can taste is your sweetness. And all I can breath is your life. And sooner or later it's over. I just don't want to miss you again. _

_And I don't want the world to see me! Cuz I don't think that they'd understand! When everything's ment to be broken, I just want you to know who I am._

Carla-Nami stood in the doorway. Turk in front of her with his back to her, talking on his cell.

She took in a breath and walked over and sat in front of him.

_And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming. Wtih your moment your truth seems to lie. When everything feels like the movies. Ya, ya bleed just to know you're alive!_

J.D.-Sanji walked into the room where Elliot-Ia was under the table.

"Elliot?"

She popped up.

"What are you doing?"

"Just searching for my dignity. I think I left it in college."

"Are you alright?"

"Well..."

_And I don't want the world to see me. Cuz I don't think that they'd understand. When everything's ment to be broken. I just you to know who I am! I just want you to know who I am! I just want you to know who I am... _

_

* * *

_

Over 1000 words... holy lord! And 7 pages!!! This is long! WOOT!

3-19-07 It took me over 3 days to complete this...


	7. Sanji and I

Hey! Hello... ya... I'll just start typing now...

I've had this typed for a while... last weekend I think... and I've finaly decided to post it!

If you watched Scrubs last night... I really hope Lavern comes out of it ok...

Chapter 7

"Ia? Ia. IA!"

Ia's eyes snapped open. She was lying down looking up at Nami.

"Carla?"

"I'm Nami." Nami said.

"IT WAS A DREAM!" she screamed.

"What was?"

"I had a dream where I was Elliot in Scrubs- it's a TV show- and Sanji was J.D., you were Carla, Zoro was Turk, Zac was Dr. Cox, Mark was Todd (Mark is this really perverted friend of mine), Cam was Janitor, Skie was Lavern, Chey was Zoro's ex, Rosette." she paused to take in a breath.

"What's going on?"

"I was still in love with J.D. (Sanji) and he didn't know it. You were all jealous because Turk (Zoro) was talking to his ex, Rosette (Chey)." she said.

"What?"

"Hum... it all seems like I knew all of that all ready. J.D. did seem that he still liked me but... OH MY GOD!" she screamed.

"What now?"

"You ARE JEALOUS OF CHEY!"

"...NO I'M NOT!" she said after hesitating.

"Come on! I knew it sounded familiar! I can... er... sorta, know peoples subconscious dreams. You _like _Zoro?"

Nami was silent.

"I was RIGHT!" she screamed.

"So?"

"You're totaly and completely jealous of Chey because he likes her and not you." she said with a tone of mocking in her voice.

"Sanji doesn't like you."

"Oh yes he does. He just was mad and wasn't thinking straight when he dumped me." she said.

Nami left the room.

"What was with that dream?" Ia asked herself.

T-O-R-T-U-R-E-D-T-A-N-G-L-E-D-H-E-A-R-T-S

Ia got dressed (jeans and striped blue and brown shirt) and headed upstairs.

She got into the kitchen and realized that they were sailing and it was lunch.

"Hey! Ia!" Luffy said.

"Hey." she said and sat down.

"Are you ok? You don't look so good." Chopper said.

"I'm fine. I'll just get something to eat." she said as Sanji glanced at her from where he was cooking.

Ia sat on the stairs and was reading _Girls in Pants. _

"Coast's clear!" Luffy said as he spotted Sanji at the bow.

"Good. Ok, you guys. We've GOT to get them back together." Nami said.

"What if they don't want to be together?" Zoro said, lounging back in a chair.

"Trust me. They do."

"How do we do that?" Luffy and Usopp asked.

"Well... I don't know. I was hoping you did?" Nami said.

"We could lock them in a room together. Then we'd be rid of both of them for a while." Zoro said with a smirk.

"We could tell them that the other one said that they wanted to get back together!" Usopp said.

"We could let them figure it out for themselves." Chopper said.

"NO! I've got it! We push Ia overboard and have Sanji save her!"

Everybody stared at him.

"What?" he asked.

"She can lift herself out of the water and she can MOVE IT!" Nami screamed and bonked Luffy on the head.

"Hey... what if Ia can hear us right now?" Usopp said. Everybody rushed to the door and looked out. Ia was still sitting on the stairs.

"Ia?" Usopp asked. Ia looked around, her eyes brown.

"Ya?" she asked.

"Nothing." he said and everybody inched back into the kitchen.

S-L-O-W-D-O-W-N

CRACK

Ia's eyes opened and she saw rain beating down onto her. She was already soaking.

She got up and started slipping around. She fell smack down onto the deck.

"Ia?"

She looked up and saw Sanji standing near her.

She didn't say anything as she took her sweet old time trying to get up on the soaking wet wood. Slipping and sliding all over the place.

Sanji skidded over and helped her up.

"Thanks." she said as she walked over to the door, Sanji right behind her.

About a foot from the door, she slipped on the wood and fell backwards into Sanji's arms.

He held her there at an angle, the rain beating down onto her face.

He pulled her up and she started kissing him.

For a while they kissed until they broke apart.

"I missed you." she whispered.

"Me too." he said, holding her in his arms.

She stayed there for a while. Letting the rain fall on her.


	8. Royal Secrets Part I

Ok... why do I do this? I post then type and post a week later??? I don't even know when I'm gonna post this... well I will when I do and that's when you'll be reading this... but still...

Chapter Eight

It's kinda funny how the crew doesn't know.

It was Ia's idea, seeing as it _was _thier idea to bring them back together. Ia did hear them.

She liked the secret romances, though!

If she could, she'd tell Skie, Chey, Zac, Amanda, Ruby, not Courtney. But... they were all home. Ya, home.

They were always hoping somebody wouldn't walk in on them kissing.

Ia made it so obvious, but they were so dense that they didn't get it.

"They're so stupid!" Ia said one day as she did the dishes while writing. The plates became clean without her touching them.

"You are the one who desn't want to tell them." Sanji said.

"But still! I've been dropping hints like bombs this past couple weeks! Ya think they'd have caught on by now, but NOOOOO!?" she said, getting so frustrated she made a plate explode.

Sanji leaped up but Ia had laready got it off the floor and into the gabage. This was the second one.

"Do you want them to know?"

"At times I do. But then again, I like it being a secret!" she said, playing with the water so the soap and water spelled her name several different times.

As Sanji leaned in to kiss her cheek, she got up and left the room without a word.

A-L-L-I-A-S-K-O-F-Y-O-U

Ia was reading _The Uncyclopedia _in her room when Nami came in.

"Ia?"

"Mmmmmmmmmmmya?" she asked, looking up.

"You were right."

"YES!" she screamed. "A-about what?" she asked.

"I like Zoro-"

"God a Kindergartener could have figured that out!"

"-But does he like me?" she continued as if she didn't hear Ia.

"Well..." she said.

"DON'T INVADE HIS MIND!" she yelled.

"Why?" she asked, put out.

"That's an invasion of privacy!"

"Come on! I've already doen it 17 times today!"

"It's 10:30 in the morning?"

"Ya? My record is 25 before 11!"

"Would he like me?" Nami asked.

"Do you want my honest opinion, or friends reassurance?"

"What one would I like?"

"The reassurance."

"Give me the honesty."

"Frankly, you're loud, annoying, bossy, snippy, conceded, hateful, fussy, obsessive, over protective, short tempered, bi-"

"Ok! I get it!"

"You're also loyal, kind, nice when people get to know you."

Nami smiled.

"Thanks."

"I'm so helpful!" Ia said, big-headedly.

Nami goit up and left but before she got out the door, she said, "I'm really glad you and Sanji are back together."

Ia looked up and felt a big lurch in her gut.

T-W-O-S-T-E-P

The reached an island with an island withe a city the size of Manhattan on it.

The crew split up, going their different ways. Ia had to persuade Sanji for 15 minutes to let her go on her own.

While walking, a huge explosion went off somewhere and the happy crowd around her turned into a state of panic. People jostled around Ia trying to get to the docks at the bottom of the hill.

Ia pushed herself to the saftey of a very narrow ally between two buildings. Panting, she looked around and saw two girls on the ground.

The girl sitting had long black hair to her waist with soft blue eyes. The other was crouching next to the other one. She had long orange hair with sharp blue eyes. They were both dressed semi-elegantly.

"Hello." Ia said.

"Leave!" the one with orange hair barked.

"Are you ok?" Ia asked the one with black hair.

"No. It's my ankle."

"I can help!" Ia said, pulling out her water bottle and using the water to heal her ankle a bit. Thank God she watched Avatar. "Chopper can heal it more. I'm just getting used to the power."

"Thank you!"

"You're welcom! May I ask, why are you here? You look to well brought up to be in an ally?"

"Can we trust you?" orange hair asked, helping the other one up.

"I am very trustworthy." Ia said. This is true. (Right, Skie?)

"My name is Cantina, and this is my little sister, Montero."

"Ok?"

"You must not be from here. We're the Princesses! We must get out of here! They're looking for us!"

* * *

Oooo! If you're in PepBand, you know their names are familier... just wait till you meet their brother! I said too much... 

3-23-07

REVIEW!!!! I COMMAND YOU!


	9. Royal Secrets Part II

Hey!!! Happy April Fools Day for the next ten minutes! Yes it's 11:50 on a SUNDAY night. I'm on Spring Break. Get over it.

Chapter Nine

"Wait? Who's after you?" Ia asked.

"Never mind that now, can you help us?"

"Sure. But-"

"Good! Let's go, Montero." Cantina yelled and grabbed her sister's wrist and dragged her out to the croud that was sprinting down to the harbor.

Ia ran after them, showing them the way.

"Where's everybody!" Nami screamed.

"Calm down! Here comes Luffy and Usopp." Zoro said.

Sanji was pacing around the deck.

"What's the matter, Sanji?" Chopper asked.

"Ia's not back yet."

"She'll be fine. She's tough." Chopper said.

Sanji continued to pace.

D-A-N-G-E-R-O-U-S-L-O-V-E

Ia ran untill she hit the wood of the docks. Panting, she looked around for the sisters.

"Where is your ship?" Cantina ordered.

"Over... there..." she said.

"Candy! Where's El?" Montero said.

"Wait... you know somebody named El Cumbanchero?" Ia asked.

"Yes. Our brother. How did you know his name?"

"Oh my God." she said.

"What is it?" Montero asked.

"CANDY! TERA!" somebody yelled.

They looked around and saw a boy waving at them.

He had wavy, ear length creamy hair. His eyes were the colour of the sea after a storm and he was tall and dreamy. Ia had to avert her gaze to stop drooling.

"El! Where the hell were you?" Cantina snapped.

"Never mind that. There are no ships out of here!" he yelled.

"Don't worry! Onee-san! This girl here's helping us." Montero said, smiling slyly.

"Ya. I'm... eh... Ia!" she said.

"El." he said, kissing her hand. Ia started giggling like she just listened to Jerry Seinfield.

T-R-O-U-B-L-E

She lead them to the ship and let them on.

"Ia!" Sanji cried.

"Guys, this is Cantina, El, and Montero. They are the royals here and need a lift to a different island. They are being chased." Ia said.

"Hey. I'm Nami."

"Zoro."

"Chopper!"

"The great captain Usopp!"

"Sanji!"

"Monkey D. Luffy! I'm the captain!" he said.

"Hello." Cantina said in a monotone.

"Hey." El said, unenthusiastic.

"Hello!" Montero said with a smile.

As the crew lead them inside and got the ship ready to set sail, "Where were you?" Sanji asked Ia quietly as they got the sails ready.

"In the city. I met the girls in an ally and agreed to help them! Is that a crime?" she said loudly.

"No. You just had me worried."

"I'm 17, Sanji. I can take care of myself." she said as she levitated herself down to the deck.

"I know." Sanji said.

She went inside.

S-O-M-E-T-H-I-N-G-B-A-D

As they sailed, Montero sat at the table in the kitchen. Sanji and Ia were also there, unable to bicker at the moment seeing as they had a guest.

Montero sighed, breaking the silence and the tension.

"Something the matter, Montero?" Ia asked.

"Call me Tera. And yes. How do you get the one you adore to notice you."

"Why? Who do you adore?" Ia asked, trying not to catch Sanji's eye.

"Can you keep a secret."

"Yes I can." Ia said.

Montero leaned closer to Ia and whispered it in Ia's ear so Sanji couldn't hear.

When she pulled back, Ia's face was a mix of horror and excitement. Her mouth was open wide and her eyes were bulging.

Montero nodded, smiling.

"OH MY GOD!"

"Shhh! You said you wouldn't tell!"

"I don't tell. I make a fuss about it like there's no tomorrow but I don't tell! What's the fun in that? Oh, but Nami's gonna have a fit if she finds out!" Ia said excitedly.

"Who is it?" Sanji asked.

"Can't tell you, Sanji. Sworn to secrecy!" Ia said, and getting up with Montero, left the room.

S-H-E-L-O-V-E-S-Y-O-U

Ia and Montero talked like two school girls that knew a jucy secret for the rest of the day. Always in a corner or isolated on deck. Nami and Cantina started getting suspicious.

"What do you think they're talking about?" Cantina asked.

"I don't know. It's sounds jucy, though." Nami said.

The two were sitting on deck, watching the two 17-year-olds chat on about God know's what.

"What could make them so ecstatic?" Cantina asked.

"Something big, that's for sure. I'll ask Ia later." Nami said.

"They look the same, have you noticed that?"

Cantina and Nami looked at each other.

"That's odd." Nami said, returning to her newspaper.

"That is." Cantina said, looking out at the vast sea.

* * *

That's amazing. What is amazing, you might ask? I really don't know. I just felt like saying that. Alehg.

Name Origins-

Candy (Cantina) is named after our PepBand song that I hate, Cantina Band (Star Wars)

Tera (Montero) is named after my second favorite PepBand song, Montero

El (El Cumbanchero) is named after my favorite PepBand song, El Cumbanchero.

4-2-07


	10. Royal Secrets Part III

I'm not sick anymore! See, this is big for me cuz I NEVER get sick (except for that one time in October) Sure... I just got over it. I haven't eaten for almost 48 hours... oh god... maybe I should be eating instead of typing...

Good God. We're on a fricken blizard and it's SPRING BREAK????!???!? What the hell is that about? Why is it that all the things that could get me out of school (illness and Snowday) happen during SPRING BREAK? This world fricken hates me...

Chapter Ten

"Tell him."

"No."

"TELL HIM!"

"NO!"

"Fine, I will!" Ia said and stepped out from behind the door. Tera pulled her back.

"Noooo! If I'm not doing it... you're not doing it!" she hissed.

"He's gonna figure it out sometime! I can tell him through my thoughts... even though I haven't figured out how to do that yet..." she said as she started to babble on. Tera stared at her.

I-F-E-E-L-F-I-N-E

Zoro watched Ia and Tera bicker over by the kitchen door. He watched them with a confused face.

"Would you please tell him?"

"Why? Why should I?" Tera asked.

"Cuz if you don't... eh... hey! This is the same thing that's happening to Skie! She got over it, though."

"What happened?"

"She told him."

"What did he do?"

"Well she told him so fast that he didn't have time to react. He finaly call me five gagilion time after that. He actually came to my house. I was sick." she said and shrugged.

"What did he do?"

"Well... oh my God I'm Lucy!" she screamed.

"Who?" Tera asked.

"Oh Good Lord! I butt into peoples lives!"

"You're just realizing this?"

"I'm just like Lucy! I never thought that I'd be just like I Love Lucy?"

"What?"

T-H-A-N-K-G-O-O-D-N-E-S-S

Zoro was sitting at the table in the kitchen, asleep.

Ia walked in, glaring at Zoro, thinking, This would be so much easier if he was awake!

She looked around. She tried to think of something that could wake him up.

She saw a glass of water. She smirked evilly.

She held the glass of water over Zoro's head as she stood out by the door for a quick getaway.

She let the water fall on his face... but he slept on.

"What the frick?" she said. He still slept on.

She took some pots and pans and did the same thing where she had them bang together so hard and loud that only a dead person couldn't hear it. Maybe he was dead since he didn't wake.

"Ok... this guys gotta wake up before I kill him." Ia said. Then an idea struck her.

She got ready at the door and started lifting Zoro's katana's away from him. His eyes snapped open and she scooted away from the door.

"What the hell?" she heard him think.

"Zoro! Zoro! Listen you idiot!" Ia thought to Zoro.

"What the hell!"

"Ok, you're being irritating. Just listen. What if I told you somebody like you?"

"Somebody does like me."

"Not- from- my- world! God! No. From this world, ya idiot."

"Ok?"

"Ya! Just go with me on this! What would you say?"

"Depends on who it is."

"You're so conceded." Ia thought and left. Leaving Zoro alone... and confused. Which is the way she likes it.

T-H-I-N-K-O-F-M-E

"I told you he's an insensitive jerk." Sanji said.

"This is beyond insensitive." Ia said.

They were sitting in the kitchen. Sanji was cooking supper while Ia was setting the table. Deciding whether or not to have Zoro's plate randomly explode during supper.

"Are you telling me that somebody here likes Zoro?"

"Two... actually." Ia muttered.

"TWO!? Why don't they like me!" he cried.

"Maybe because you're taken?" Ia said.

"Mmm"

"Well. You are." Ia said.

"Ya." Sanji said.

Ia glared at the back of his head.

* * *

Blizzard suck during spring break.

Please review... no just review. NOW!

4-4-07


	11. Royal Secrets Part IV

Ok... this will be finished! No I'm not gonna make it a Finn... like me. Or have it end. There are soOHooo many more things I have to write down before I move on to the thrid one... koff started koff

I got a new hairstyle! I love it soooooo much! But you probably want me to get on writing, right. My hair has a layer in the back, it's completely straight! YEA!

Chapter Eleven

"Ia?"

"Yes." she said, not looking up from her notebook.

"W-who likes me?" Zoro asked, sitting down next to her on the stairs.

It was a little after two in the afternoon and the crew were sailing slowly towards the next island, which is where Tera, Candy, and El would get off.

"Why should I tell you?" Ia asked, putting her pencil on the spiral on the page she was at and closing the blue cover.

"Cuz I want to know." he said, trying to keep his anger down. She's just so difficult and frustrating.

"I told you their from your world." Ia said.

"You also said two people."

"I did... maybe." Ia said, thinking in her usual maner. Head tilted and eyes looking up.

"Yes."

"Oh. Ok?" Ia said. "Who did you guess?"

"I have to guess."

"Yes. Guess! It's more entertaining to me." Ia said smugly and leaned back agains the railing and smiled smugly at him as he guessed.

"That princess... and you."

"ME!? WHAT THE FRICK? WHAT MADE YOU COME TO THAT CONCLUSION?" Ia yelled.

"You were making it obvious that somebody like me. You usually would do something like that."

"LIKE HOW!?"

"Try and be sneaky about it."

Ia glared daggers at him. Zoro didn't recoil, as much as he wanted to.

"It's not me," she hissed. "Guess again."

"Did I get one right?"

"Guess again." she hissed so softly and menacingly.

"The other princess."

"Which one." Ia said, her temper dropping down a bit.

"The one who looks like Nami."

Ia was silent. Trying to see if he would get that he just said both girls that like him.

"No."

"No?"

"You got it right. The first time. Just... another person-oop! Gonna go!" Ia said and ran off to her room. Leaving Zoro dazed and confused, just how she like it.

G-I-R-L-S

For the rest of the day, Zoro appeared at random in front of Ia saying, "Tell me." And every time, Ia'd say, "No."

"God, he's so annoying." Ia said as she entered her room. Nami was there already.

"Who?"

"Zoro. Good God, I let him know that somebody likes him and he jumps down my throat!"

"YOU TOLD HIM I LIKED HIM!?" Nami screamed.

"No."

Suddenly, Zoro burst through the trapdoor and down onto the floor.

"Zoro, you're acting like Sanji." Ia said. Nami's face was of complete horror.

"D-did you h-hear?" Nami said.

"Yes. Who couldn't?"

"So... now you know..." Nami said.

"Yah. I guess I do."

"So?"

"So what?"

They stared at each other for a long time. Ia took this time to sneak out of the bedroom. But before she could get out entirely, they kissed.

"God, get a room."

A-S-L-O-N-G-A-S-Y-O-U-R-M-I-N-E

"I'm gonna miss you!" Ia said, hugging Tera.

"Me too. Did you tell Zoro?" she asked, smiling.

"No." she said.

Tera's face fell. "Oh."

"He likes Nami." Ia said.

"Don't worry. I'll end up marrying some Prince or something." Tera said, trying to hide her emotions.

"It was either you or my sister." Candy said to Nami. The two had become close friends.

"It would have been hard on her." Nami said.

"Yes. Now we can marry Princes!" Candy said.

"Mmmm." Nami said, remembering Bear King.

"Candy, Tera. Let's go." El said, in a hurry.

"Bye you guys!" they called as they got into a carriage.

"Bye." the crew said.

"God, I'm tired," Ia said, stretching. "I think I'll go take a nap. Wow am I tired." Ia said as she walked into her room and flopped down onto her bed and fell asleep instantly.

* * *

Short. I know. I promice the next one will be long. It's gotta be. I won't make a short chapter seeing as I'm obsessed with format of the next one coming up.

4-6-07...


	12. Office Romances

Hi, people. Guess what. IT'S THE OFFICE CHAPTER:D I'm sooooo excited!!!

Chapter TWELVE

Ia opened her eyes and saw a computer screen.

"What the hell?" she whispered as somebody said, "Morning, Pam!"

Her eyes widened when she saw Luffy... in a pinstripe suite, and no hat.

"Michael?"

"Yes, Pam?" Michael-Luffy asked before going into his office.

"Jan called." Ia said just like Pam. She wasn't even sure if Jan, the boss that was going with Michael (if this was season three), had called.

Ia looked around and saw... Zoro. DWIGHT! Zoro-Dwight was playing with his Dwight-Zoro bobble-head. Zoro-Dwight was also wearing a evening suite.

"Oh my God! Dwight, why are you wearing that suite?" Ia-Pam asked.

"For Casino Night tonight, Pam. Did you forget?"

"No. Just wondering."

Ia looked around and saw that everybody was here! There's Nami as Kelly, the annoying and talkative and irritating girl at Costumer Service. And there's Chey as Angela the strict and stern accountant and Zac as Kevin... the slow, unnecessary, and slow big guy also in Accounting.

"This is great!" as Ryan-Usopp, the Temp, came in with Phyllis-Skie. Phyllis was the, as Michael called her, the resident grandma. Even if they were the same age.

Ia was laughing to herself as Jim came in.

"Hey, Pam!" he said and Ia looked up and stopped laughing instantly. It was Cam.

"Hey. Got any cruel pranks set up for Dwight today?" she asked.

"Actually yes!" he said and went over to his desk. Ia smiled evilly to herself.

H-E-A-L-M-E-I-M-H-E-A-R-T-S-I-C-K

Ia-Pam answered phone calls... played solitaire on her computer... and talked to Jim-Cam for a bit.

"Hey, Dwight?"

"Yes, Jim?" Zoro-Dwight asked. Not really caring.

"Did you know I can move things with my mind. Ever since I was a little kid?"

"Impossible." Dwight-Zoro said quickly.

"It's true!"

"Prove it. Move that coat rack." he said, pointing at the one near Pam-Ia's desk.

Jim-Cam shrugged and put his fingers up in a pose that he was holding something and stared at the coat rack. It moved ever so slightly as Jim-Cam stared at it. Dwight-Zoro stared in astonishment.

-Cut to Pam-Ia sitting holding up the umbrella with the hook handle, smiling-

Jim-Cam glanced at Pam-Ia real quick and she winked. Dwight-Zoro still stared.

-Cut to Dwight-Zoro sitting.

"There is no way that Jim could have moved that coat rack! No way. I will prove it."-

B-E-L-I-E-V-E

Later that day, during their lunch break, Pam-Ia sat at her desk, already finished with her lunch as Dwight-Zoro comes over and stares at the coat rack. He quickly checked to see if anybody was looking and made a circle and encircled the rack moving his arms down to the floor. Seeing that there were no secret strings attached to the coat rack, he quickly went back to his desk.

Jim-Cam and Pam-Ia were in the Conference Room watching tapes of bands for Pam's wedding to Roy-Sanji.

"Ooh. Here's one... Scrantonicity." Ia-Pam said and put it in.

Up came a Police cover band playing a various song. Watching it... getting board...

"Woe! Hold up! Is that Kevin!?" Jim-Cam yelled suddenly, pausing it and seeing the drummer who was, in fact, Kevin-Zac.

"Oh my God!" Pam-Ia yelled.

"This is amazing! I never knew that this is the secret life of Kevin!" Jim-Cam said.

-Cut to Kevin-Zac sitting. "Yes. I'm in a band. We don't normaly play in front of people. This would be a big change for the band. Yah." Kevin-Zac said slowly.-

"This is amazing!" Pam-Ia said.

P-O-P-U-L-A-R

At Casino Night down in the Warehouse, Michael made it clear that the money was going towards the Boy Scouts of America.

-Cut to Michael standing. "I intend to win that miny refrigerator from Vance Refrigeration. And all that money to not go to Comic Relief... seeing as it's doesn't exist."-

As they played their Casino games, Michael-Luffy lost a lot of money to Toby the guy from Human Resources, Kevin-Zac found that he wasn't as good as he though, and Jim-Cam won at Texas Hold Em because whenever he coughed, Dwight-Zoro folded.

-Cut to Dwight standing.

"Everybody has little ways of showing that they have a good hand. Whenever Jim has a good hand, he coughs."-

-Cut to Jim standing.

"It's amazing! Whenever I cough, Dwight folds! This is great!"-

Pam-Ia and Roy-Sanji played games and lost and won money. Eventually, Roy-Sanji left to go home.

"So... I'll see you later tonight?" Pam-Ia asked Roy-Sanji as he sat in his truck.

"Ya. See you later!" he said and they kissed. Then he drove off after saying "Keep an eye on her, Halpert." to Jim-Cam.

He nodded.

They stood in the parking lot, awkwardly.

"Pam... I need to tell you. I'm in love with you. I've been for a while now."

Pam-Ia was stunned (even if she knew this was coming). "Why are you telling me this?" she asked. Still know full well why and what was coming up.

"I wanted you to know. And now you do." he said.

"I can't work between us. I'm sorry that you misinterpreted our friendship." she said and went inside.

W-H-A-T-I-S-T-H-I-S-F-E-E-L-I-N-G

"He just out and said it... I don't know, about ten minutes ago... what am I suppose to do, mom? He's my friend." Pam-Ia said on the phone up in the dark office as Jim-Cam came in. "I gotta go." she said quickly and hung up.

"Jim-" she started but ended when he came over and started kissing her.

She started kissing him back.

They kissed for a while and then broke apart. They stared at each other for a while...

* * *

Friday the 13th... April 2007...

Please get your Constructive Criticisms in ASAP


	13. Suki dakedo Aishitenai

I HATE BLIZZARDS IN APRIL!!! It's snowed more in the past week than it has in the past month.

Chapter Thirteen

Ia opened her eyes but this time she saw two faces looking down at her.

"GOOD LORD!" she screamed and fell off the small bed.

"Morning!" Skie said.

"Hello." Ia said flatly, getting up. She noticed that she was still wearing what she was wearing the day before. Jeans with her grey sweatshirt (she couldn't remember what shirt). Her straight hair was tossled a bit and she was still groggy when Skie and Chey helped her up.

"How long you been sleeping?" Chey asked.

"I don't know. I went to take a nap and now this. Is it morning?" Ia asked.

"Yes. We've been here for about an hour. I'm actually suppose to be in gym right now."

"You never go to gym." Ia said, as they made their way up to the kitchen.

"So?" Skie asked huffily. Chey and Ia laughed.

I-M-M-I-G-R-A-N-T-S-O-N-G

"Morning, all!" Ia said as she, Chey, and Skie walked into the kitchen.

"SKIE!" Usopp yelled and fell backwards in his chair. Zoro scooted away from Nami.

"SKIE!" Luffy yelled and jumpped up for joy.

Ia, Skie, and Chey sat down at the table.

Sanji walked up, gave Ia a kiss on the cheek, and gave the girls some breakfast. Ia felt a bubble of guilt blow up in her gut as Sanji walked away. She wished she could just pop it.

S-E-T-Y-O-U-F-R-E-E

Ia brought Skie and Chey down to her room. Since it was raining hard outside (unlike here where it's snowing like mad), she had to bring them down there.

"What is it?" Chey asked.

"I have something to do but I don't want to hurt him."

"What are you doing to Sanji?" Skie asked.

"Ok... I had this dream (an Office dream), where we were all there including the crew. Sanji was Roy (I was Pam) and Jim was Cam. I realized that we weren't right for each other so..."

"What are you saying? That a dream told you to break up with Sanji?" Skie yelled.

"SHHHHHH! Yes."

"What do dreams know?" Skie said.

"It's true." Ia said, sitting down.

"What is? Skie or your dream?" Chey asked.

"My dream." Ia said making Skie yell "HEY!"

"Are you?" Chey asked.

Ia didn't answer.

H-E-A-R-T-A-C-H-T-O-N-I-G-H-T

After supper, Ia wished that it would stop raining... but seeing as the weather hated her in her world and this one... she was stuck inside. She really didn't want to do this but she had to. Who knows how long this could go on for.

"Do it." Skie whispered.

"Why do you want me to break up with him so badly?" Ia asked Skie in a whisper.

"So I can take him!"

Ia stared at Skie in disbelief. "You're GOING OUT WITH SOMEONE!" she hissed nearly yelling at her.

"Oh ya. What about you!? HUM!?" Skie said, pointing at her.

"Ok I'll admit..."

"YOU ARE!?" Skie yelled.

"SHHHHHHH!" Chey hissed in their faces.

The girls were crouched outside the kitchen door, the rain trying to beat against them but Ia kept it off of them.

"Can't you do it tomorrow?" Chey asked.

"I have to be honest and I have to be quick. I'll just procrastinate and never tell him!" Ia said.

"Don't."

"Wouldn't you want to know if your BF was cheating on you!?" Ia hissed at Chey.

"Zoro isn't."

Ia snorted so loudly that they had to scamper over around the corner of the wall so Sanji wouldn't see them as he poked his head out of the door quickly.

"WHAT ARE YOU SAYING!?" Chey screamed when they got down into the room that Skie and Chey were staying in.

Ia said nothing as she sat down on the bed, watching the girls ring their wet hair out. Ia just lifted up her hand and took out all the water in her hair and clothes, leaving them bone dry. They had gotten soaked when they ran to their room.

"WELL!?" Chey screamed.

"Calm down. Just because Zoro's goingoutwithNamidoesn'tmeanyouhavetogetallhuffyaboutit." Ia said.

"What?"

"YOU SAID THE "W" WORD!" Ia yelled happily.

"What did you say?"

"Zoro'sgoingoutwithNami." she said quickly agian.

"PLEASE TELL ME!" she screamed, getting hysterical.

Ia shook her head. "No."

"TELL ME!" she said through gritted teath.

Ia got up quickly and left the room at a fast pace.

She found Zoro sleeping in his room. Luffy and Usopp were up in the kitchen.

She plopped him off the hammock and he hit the floor with a thud.

"WHAT THE HELL!?" he yelled.

"Why are all these people yelling at me today?" she asked herself. "Guess what! Chey knows!" she said, smirking.

Zoro's mouth went dry. "S-she knows?" he chocked.

"Yup!" she said and skipped out of the room.

O-P-T-I-M-I-S-T-I-C-V-O-I-C-E-S

Zoro found Chey sitting on deck the next morning. She was reading, leaning against the mast, her back to him.

Zoro walked up slowly and quietly.

"Chey?"

"Ya?" he asked, turning around and closing _Instant Teen. _

"Uh... I-er- just... didn't know that you-er- if you would ever come back or if I'd ever see you again so I didn't-er- I just..." he trailed off. Trying to find a way to get Chey to understand without her freaking out.

"What are you saying?" she asked, standing up. The top of her head came to about his noes.

"I'm like Nami," he said. "Now." he added. Hoping it sounded right... but it made it sound even worse.

Chey was silent.

"Chey?" he asked.

She didn't say anything as she walked away.

Zoro felt miserable.

L-O-V-E-M-E-D-O

"You're not mad, sad, or anything at all?" Ia asked in disbelief.

"It's ok. I get the point. Plus I'm going out with someone else?" Chey said.

"I don't even see how we can call ourselves Hopeless Romantics anymore." Ia yelled. Getting frustrated.

"We are." Skie said.

Ia glared at her.

"Did you tell him yet?" Chey asked.

"No. Should I?" Ia said flatly.

"You said you didn't want to procrastinate." Chey said in a matter-o-factly tone of voice.

"Shut up." Ia said.

F-R-E-E-B-I-R-D

"Sanji?" Ia asked, walking into the kitchen. It was right after supper and he was just finishing the dishes.

"Yes, my Ia-Swan?" he asked. She felt the pit of guilt dig itself into her gut.

"Uh... I have something to tell you." she said. Still standing by the door.

"What is it?" he asked. _'Is she going to tell me she loves me!' _Sanji thought. Ia felt her self fall in two at hearing that.

"Suki-dakedo aishitenai. We... we can't be together. It won't work out." she said.

Sanji was stunned at what he heard.

"I'm sorry! But I realized that we shouldn't be together if only one of us loves the other one. I'm so sorry, Sanji. I really am." Ia said and left the room slowly.

* * *

WHAT HAVE I DONE!?

Friday the 13th! OH MY GOD! Baaaaaaaaaad luck. With my luck, I'll probably have strep...

Translation- _Suki-dakedo aishitenai _ I like you but i don't love you


	14. Nami's Influence

Here's Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

NAMI'S POV

I thought that Ia and Sanji would be miserable or at least sad. Really, they're... fine? Ia's back to just reading and mouthing off all day and Sanji's back to chasing me (Zoro's not to happy about that at all).

"Arn't you sad at all?"

"Nope."

"Do you regret it?"

"Nope."

"What are you feeling?"

She turned her head at me and said, "Happy?" like it was obvious.

"What are you doing?" I asked. We were out on deck sitting on the stairs that led to the stern. She had a book in her hands.

"I'm reading _The Wonderful Wizard of Oz_."she said, showing me the cover. The cover had an ugly blond girl in a checkered blue and white dress with a little black dog. Along with her was a Lion, a Scarecrow, and a man of metal. They were on a path of yellow brick.

"Ok..." I said, not knowing what to say.

"Ya. It's a classic!" she said.

"Hold on... I just noticed. Where do all these books come from? You're always reading a different one?"

"I really don't know." Ia said and went back to reading.

S-T-O-R-Y-C-O-N-T-I-N-U-E-S

I walked into the kitchen to see if Sanji was sad at all.

"Hey, Sanji." I said when I walked in.

"NAMI-SAN!" he cried when he saw me come in.

"I have a question." I asked.

"Ask away, my sweet!" he said, in his normal Sanji's-with-a-girl voice.

"Do you fell sad or miserable or bad that Ia dumped you?" I asked.

"I was sad at first, but then I got over it." he said.

"Really? That fast? It's less then twelve hours?" I yelled.

"Ya, so?" he said.

I just stomped out of the room.

"What am I going to do?" I asked Chopper.

"About what?" he asked. I had just walked into the room and he obviously didn't know what I was talking about.

"About Sanji and Ia! They are completely happy about the whole thing! THEY'RE NOT SUPPOSE TO BE!"

"Maybe they just arn't right for each other. So Ia realized this and told Sanji and then he realized it." the little Reindeer said.

"Shouldn't they be sad? Or mad? Or something other than happy!?"

"What did Sanji say?"

"He got over it."

"He was sad. Ia knew this was a true thing so she couldn't really be sad if she doesn't like him anymore."

"I guess so." I said. Not wanting to believe it.

"Ok?"

I just got up and walked out of the room.

T-H-E-R-E-M-U-S-T-B-E-S-O-M-E-K-I-N-D-O-F-W-A-Y-O-U-T-O-F-H-E-R-E

I sat in my room for a while trying to figure out how the hell I could make them see the error of their ways.

"What'ch ya doing?" Ia asked from behind me. I dropped drink and spun around.

"What the hell? I thought you were on the island?"

"Ya. I was? I came back cuz I spent all my money."

"Where do you get your money anyway? Never mind-"

"You said never mind to money!?" she said in disbelief.

"Why did you break up with him?"

"Why are you asking?"

"I want to know!"

"I told you. I didn't like him like that anymore." Ia said plainly as if she was talking to a 5-year-old.

"You were so in love with him for so long!?"

"I told you before when I first got here." Ia said, puting her bags down on her small bed.

"About..."

"Ya." Ia said.

"But that's why he broke up with you in the beginning?" I asked.

"I know. I think- know thats why I broke up with him now." Ia said, sitting down.

"You're... absolutely right."

"YES! I mean... ya. I am." she said, smiling smugly/happily.

H-E-L-L-O-G-O-O-D-B-Y-E

I sat there and though...

"Nami?" somebody (Zoro) asked from behind me.

"Yes."

"Are you done ruining Dartboard and the Evilone's lives yet?" he asked, sitting down next to me.

"Yes. I'm done," I said, exasperated. "Why do you care?"

"I don't."

I rolled my eyes.

"You just invade people's lives."

"I do not!?" I yelled.

"YES YOU DO!" Ia yelled from far off.

"STOP EAVESDROPPING!"

"I CAN'T HELP IT IF YOU THINK DISTURBING THOUGHTS AND MY MIND JUST _HAS_ TO GO THERE!" she yelled.

I smiled.

* * *

4-27-07 RANT AND RAVE!

YELL AND SCREAM AND RANT AND RAVE, THERE'S NO USE, YOU NEED TO SAYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!

Mountain Dew and Clasical MDnC!


	15. The Subscioncious Attack

As of right now... I have no ideas for chapter 15... eh...

Chapter Fiveteen

Ia spent most of the day on the island they were on. Shopping, of course. Where did she get the money? She stole it from Nami, o' course!

When she got back to the ship, she walked down to her bedroom and put her stuff down and heard a huge, "OWWW!"

She instantly picked up her stuff and saw her small little annoying shoulder angel that looked exactly like her.

"What the hell!?" she yelled as the little person picked themselves up and flew in front of Ia's face.

"I'D BE BACK! MU HA HA HA HA HA HA!" she screamed.

"I hate you." Ia said and took a glass off the bar and trapped the little Ia inside of it.

"LET ME OUT!" she screamed.

"No. Why are you here?" she said calmly.

"I told you I'd be back."

"No you didn't!?"

"Oh... well you knew this was coming! You've seen enough movies to tell you that they'd be back! They always come back!"

"Ok, fine! What do you want?"

"I'm just gonna be with you at all times of the day!"

"Damn you!"

"Sorry! Angle!" she said and smiled at her wings.

"What do you want."

"To annoy you. And to tell you that Zac and Skie are going out."

"HOLY CRAP! THEY ARE! AND I'M MISSING THIS? WHAT THE HELL! I COULD BE THERE!?" Ia screamed and dropped the glass so it shattered and the Little Ia got out.

"Yes. It's true. They act like they arn't, though. Not like you and Cam."

Ia glared at the Little Ia. "Do you have a name?" she spat.

"Yes! Bibs!"

"Original!" Ia snapped and sat down at the bar.

Bibs looked at her and sped up the stairs into the rest of the ship. Ia watched and sprinted after her.

D-I-N-N-E-R-I-S-S-E-R-V-E-D

Bibs sped into the kitchen were Sanji was making supper. She flew up but got tangled in his hair.

"CRAPOLA FROM SAGOLA!" Bibs screamed.

"Who said that?" Sanji asked, spinning around many times so Bibs nearly barfed.

"Where is she!?" Ia screamed hysterically as she appeared in the doorway.

"Who?" Sanji asked. "A GIRL!?" he squealed.

"Sorta."

"I'M A GIRL!" Bibs screamed from the back of Sanji's head.

"Sanji, turn around." Ia said and saw Bibs tangled in the mess of perfect blond hair.

She reached up and started untangling the little thing. All the while, Sanji's heart raced.

"Got her." Ia said and held Bibs tightly in her fist. Sanji looked and nearly had a heart attack.

Bibs was trying to pry herself from Ia's grasp, her wings sticking out.

"What the hell is that." Sanji asked.

"This is Bibs. She's supposedly my Subconscious. Bibs, Sanji. Sanji, Bibs."

"Nice to meet you." Bibs said.

Sanji stared at Bibs.

"Am I dreaming?" he asked.

"No." Ia said.

"Is it a... fairy?" he asked, still disturbed by it.

"No. I told you, she-it's my Subconscious." Ia said.

"See, I was the one who brought her back here." Bibs said, still trying to break Ia's fist. She finaly gave up and her wings hung limp and she rested her elbow on Ia's thumb and then rested her chin in her hand. Looking entirely board.

"I hate you." Ia said bitterly.

Bibs smirked for a moment then went back to being board.

"I'm a little weirded out." he said.

"I've gotten over that. You shall to." Ia said.

C-O-M-E-O-U-T-C-O-M-E-O-U-T

Ia had finaly let go of Bibs and she was free to fly around. Zoro had a certain flash back of a certain phoenix humanoid.

Bibs found Sanji and ran into his head.

"What the hell, little annoying thing!?" Sanji yelled.

"You still like her!" she said in a sing-song tone.

"What?"

"You still like Ia! I could fell your blood pressure go up when she was untangling me!" Bibs said smugly.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You want her to be with you. But you know she won't go with you."

"How do you know that?" Sanji whispered.

"Hey! I'm Ia's Subconscious! I'm just like her. I'm pretty much her alter-ego. Like her friend Zac's is Clark Kent!"

Sanji gave her a confused look.

"I can read minds just like her, you stupid idiot." Bibs said, sitting down on the railing in front of him. They were out on deck and Sanji was smoking, again.

"Oh. So why are you telling me this?"

"You have to tell her."

"What is it with Ia and telling people everything?" Sanji snapped.

"She just likes to torture people." Bibs said.

"I like to do what?" Ia asked, stepping out onto the dark deck.

"Nothing."

"You, room." Ia said. Pointing to Bibs then pointing behind her.

Bibs stood up and flew into the ship.

"Did she hurt you?" Ia asked, sitting down next to Sanji. His skipped a breath and started coughing.

"I'm fine." he managed to say.

"She didn't do anything to you?" Ia asked.

"No. Just talked."

"Odd." Ia said.

"What makes you say that?" Sanji asked, hoping to God that she didn't hear the conversation.

"If she's my Subconscious... why would she be nice... huh."

"Maybe she's the nice part of you?"

"She probably is. I've been feeling very hostile lately. I just stuck Luffy's head into the cake."

"What cake?"

"I made a cake while you were out here just so I could either eat it or use it for evil purposes. I did both. I stuck Luffy's head in it and ate the part that he didn't touch. It was very good! Double chocolate cake! Yum! Well, good night!" she said as she got up. She patted his shoulder and went inside. Sanji nearly melted.

* * *

4-28-07

What is with me and the romatics? Well... the Three Amigops (Chuck, Skie, and I) are Hostile Bitches and Hopeless Romatic's... I'm surprised that our BF's arn't dead or how they're going out with us in the first place... huh. That's a mystery!? Review. Now.


	16. Just an Attack

This is a weird idea... let's see how it goes along! (Evil grin)  
Hey! I'm updating this during class! WOO HOO!

Chapter Sixteen

_**SANJI'S POV**_

We reached another island, this time, with a huge city.

"Going shopping." Ia said, her headphones on her head. She was listening to _Shook me All Night Long, _from what I could hear. She had once told me the name of the song.

"Where's Bibs?" Usopp asked, hiding behind a chair.

"Right here?" Bibs said from Ia's shoulder, blowing bit's of Ia's hair off herself.

"Don't get into any trouble." Nami said.

"I won't!" Ia sneered and left with Bibs.

As soon as Ia was gone, "I'm going shopping too. We need food." I said and left in a hurry. I wanted to keep an eye on Ia.

T-R-A-V-E-L-I-N-G-S-O-L-D-I-E-R

_**OUT OF SANJI'S POV FOR A MOMENT**_

"When can we get her, boss?" a graspy, thin little man asked excitedly to a big gruff guy next to him on the roof.

"Soon. When she's out of sight of the blond." the big guy said calmly. He smirked as he watched Ia walked down the street, moving out of the way of the croud. Bibs sat on top of Ia's head. Being secure by Ia's headphones.

_**SANJI'S POV AGAIN**_

I followed close behind Ia. She didn't notice. She didn't randomly listen to thoughts anymore and if she did now, she wouldn't hear me. Too many people.

She walked down the street, stopping at random shops and stalls to buy stuff.

After a while, I started getting board and thought about actually getting food like I told Nami when Ia went down a path that led into the dense trees. I looked down the path when I got to the path and found her gone!

"Ia? Ia!? IA!" I called. When I ran down the path, I found her bags and Bibs laying on the ground. Bibs was unconscious.

"Bibs... Bibs." I asked.

She stayed silent. I picked up Ia's bags and ran back to the ship.

I-V-E-G-O-T-M-Y-E-Y-E-O-N-Y-O-U

When I got to the ship, Nami and Zoro were out on deck and Luffy was running around the beach. Usopp was creating a new weapon with Chopper and it didn't look like anything was wrong.

"Nami-San!"

"What is it, Sanji?" she asked. She stopped calling me Sanji-Kun when she started liking Zoro.

"Look!" I said when I got up to the deck. Nami-San got up from her taning and looked at what I had in my hands.

"Is she ok?" Nami asked, picking Bibs up gently.

I shrugged.

"CHOPPER! COME HERE!"

"What?" He called back to Nami.

"We've got an emergency!"

M-Y-B-R-A-I-N-I-S-H-I-D-I-N-G-U-P-S-I-D-E-D-O-W-N

Chopper put Bibs on the kitchen table and took a look at her.

"She's fine. Just knocked out cold." he squeaked.

"Wait... if Bibs's here... where's Ia?" Luffy asked, just realizing it first that Ia-Swan wasn't here.

"Ya... Sanji, where is Ia?" Usopp and Chopper asked.

They all stared at me until I said, "I don't know."

"WHAT!?" Nami screamed.

"I got to where Bibs was and she wasn't there. Only her bags and Bibs." I said, sitting down.

"Wait a minute... why were you so near Bibs and Ia in the first place?" Usopp asked.

"Ya... why is that, Sanji?" Nami said feircly.

"I... was... walking around trying to find her after I had bought my food and saw her bags laying on the ground!"

"So you bring home her bags and drop all your food?"

"I didn't- er- have- um- that much food anyway! Like- um er- a coconut?!"

"Bleh! Coconut!?" Luffy yelled.

"Hum... too bad we don't have Ia here to tell if you're lying or not." Nami said.

"We have Bibs!" Luffy yelled and pointed to the little Ia-chan clone as it started to wake up.

"Where the hell am I?" she asked as she rubbed her head.

"Is Sanji lying?" Nami asked.

"Lying about what?" Bibs said to Nami. I backed away into the wall slowly.

Bibs stared at me and said, "What about? He's been lying through this entire ordeal." she said.

"REALLY!? I mean- er- really? About what, exactly?" Nami asked, smiling evilly towards me.

"Well, he's been stalking Ia for the past couple of days. I know why but I'm sworn to secrecy."

"When did he make you do that!" Nami screamed.

"About two seconds ago. He's been thinking it straight for around ten. Anyway- before I was so _rudely _interrupted, he didn't actually get food, he was following Ia and I. Ia didn't know, she couldn't hear any thoughts because-"

"There were so many people!" I yelled.

"No. She had her headphones on. I could hear you plain as day." Bibs said in a matter-o-factly tone of voice.

"So where is she?" Zoro asked.

"I know as much as you do."

"BUT YOU CAN HEAR HER THOUGHTS! ISN'T SHE SAYING WHERE SHE IS RIGHT NOW?!" Nami screamed.

"Three things," Bibs said very calmly. "One, I'm too far away to be able to hear anything. Two, she's unconscious. And three, I DON'T LIKE PEOPLE SCREAMING IN MY FACE!"

N-O-O-N-E-M-O-U-R-N-S-T-H-E-W-I-C-K-E-D

_**NO POV**_

Way up high on the mountain were three poles sticking in the earth. Ia was tied up around the middle one, still unconscious.

"Which one do we get next?" a little man who was hunched over like a monkey asked in a raspy voice while rubbing his hands together. He looked pretty mid-evil.

"Just wait. The next will be the body and sprit! Just wait!"

"Alright, master!" the little guy said. As he laughed evilly, his loose baggy skin shook and his ghost white hair stood on end.

* * *

5-1-07 

That guy is creepy... I can see him... elh...

Poor Sanji. He let me get caught by a buncha jerks who wanna kill me to get- SHUT UP!

Sorry... don't wanna spoil the rest of it...

RANT AND RAVE! MDnC!!!


	17. They Hate Each Other

Ok... I'm soooo breaking my own rules here, but... HE BEGGED ME!!! He's so adorable when he beggs to me! In any way, he's adorable! P

Chapter Seventeen

"Ok. We'll devise a search party-" Nami started but was cut off by someone screaming, "WHERE'S MY IA-SWAN!?"

"SANJI! Stop screaming!" Nami yelled.

"That wasn't me?" Sanji said as everybody looked around towards the trees about 50 feet away from them. Standing there was a guy about a few inches taller than Ia (5'5"). He was wearing a grey sweatshirt that said FU on it (Finlandia University) with baggy jeans that were ripped at the knee. His hair was almost a bowl cut except for one side of it, the ends were flipped up at random. He was standing hunched over a bit like a crazy person. His eyes were glaring at the crew like a crazy spaztastic person.

"Who the hell are you and how do you know Ia-Chan?" Sanji yelled, walking up a few feet.

"How do I know her? I'm her boyfriend!?" they yelled.

Sanji stared at him for a few seconds then the stare turned into a glare. The crew were silent. The tension was so thick that Zoro probably couldn't cut it.

"Prove it." Sanji said.

He rolled his eyes and pulled out a chain with half a heart on it. Ia had the other half.

"How'd you get here, Cam?" Nami asked, trying to break the tension between the two people.

"How do you know my name?" he asked, walking past Sanji who was still in silence.

"Ia told me about you."

"Oh. Well, I don't really remember. I was in class... and I started thinking of her and next thing I knew I'm here? Where is she?" Cam asked.

"We don't know." Usopp said.

"HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW WHERE SHE IS?!" Cam yelled.

"She was kidnaped!" Luffy yelled.

Cam stared at him and all of a sudden, Luffy was flying through the air and he landed on deck of the Going Merry.

O.O was all the crew did.

"HOW'D YOU DO THAT!?" Zoro screamed.

"Vauhti Vauhti Fruit." he said.

"What's that mean?" Chopper asked.

"Speed Speed. I can run really fast."

"COOL!" Luffy yelled from the ship and rocketed back to the shore.

"ENOUGH! We need to find Ia. Let's go." Nami shouted and marched off towards the city.

W-H-Y-H-A-V-E-Y-O-U-B-R-O-U-G-H-T-M-E-H-E-R-E

Ia lifted her head up slowly and opened her eyes. She was on top of the mountain on a huge ledge. On either side of her were two other woden poles. She was tied to the last one. She looked around and saw a fire pit in front of her and three woden tables the length about a normal person's height. She was about to unravel the ropes with her mind when two minions of the big guy came out from a cave Ia couldn't see.

"Ah! You're up." one said sadistically.

"You won't be able to get out now! We've got this!" he yelled and held up her two necklaces. The one with her name on it and the one Cam gave her for Christmas Frosh year.

"HEY! GIVE THEM BACK, YOU FRICKEN IDIOTS!" Ia screamed and tried to kick them. She could easily knock them off the cliff and untie the ropes in time to see them splat on the rocks below, but she wanted to escape when nobody could see her, and more importantly, when nobody could chase her. Being lazy, she didn't feel like fighting them.

"NO! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!"

"You guys suck." Ia said in a monotone. Then she remembered what Chey had once asked. 'You can't sing in a monotone!' "HEY YOU GUYS! Can you sing in a monotone?" Ia asked, for no real reason, she was board.

"Um... well?" they said as they started trying to sing some random songs in a monotone.

"Uh un. You were going up and down on the scale. You have to sing it in one steady note." Ia said, shaking her head.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" the big guy roared from the cave, as he emerged slightly.

"W-w-we're so s-s-sorry! M-m-master!" they whimpered.

"GO GET THE OTHERS!" he roared and disappeared.

"What others? Who? Who are they?"

"Well, the boss wants to get revenge on Straw Hat Luffy. So he's gonna take the most powerful mind, body, and spirit from his crew! We already have mind! Now all we need is body and spirit!" they said before they jumped down to the various ledges.

"Body and Spirit? Hum... DAMN IT! There gonna get Zoro and Usopp? IDIOTS! I guess I should go save them." Ia said as another sentry came out.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"What are you doing?"

"I asked you first!" he yelled.

Ia smirked. "Yes. But I asked you and it's rude to ignore a question. No matter how stupid."

"But you ignored mine!" he cried, pointing at her.

"No. I didn't. I responded by asking you a question!" Ia said, smiling evilly.

"Grrrr! Fine. I'm here to guard you. The Boss said that you might escape."

"Now how could I do that! I'm tied up, you see!" she said happily but he was to stupid to see past that.

"He suspects that you can still... how you say... Mind Bend?"

"Yes. I can mind bend. But they took my necklaces, you see. Could you get them back for me?" she asked sweetly like a preppy girl asking a favor from a hot guy.

"Since you asked... sure!" he said and jumped down the ledges to find the other two guys.

"Moron." Ia muttered and stayed there. She wanted her necklaces back.

* * *

5-3-07

Did you know that five years ago today the First Spider-Man came out in theaters!? IT DID!

AND THE THIRD SPIDER-MAN IS COMING OUT! TOMORROW! OH MY GOD I'M SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO EXCITED!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I am... believe me!


	18. Zoro then Usopp

SPIDER-MAN 3!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH

Chapter Eighteen

Bibs sat on Cam's shoulder as Cam wouldn't let her near anybody else.

"Do you know where she is?"

"Like I told everybody else, I don't know." Bibs said.

Sanji brought the group to where he last saw Ia.

"Right here is the path she went up."

"Do you remember anything, Bibs?" Chopper asked.

"I remember her saying that she was going to go in here to play- just because she's 17, doesn't mean she can't play in the woods!" Bibs snapped, making everybody jump. "Anyway. She put her stuff down and looked around for a place where she could call a fort. I, on the other hand, was flying around her head. A lock of her hair in my hands. All of a sudden, something hit Ia over the head and she went over like her three legged dog on a sharp turn! I was in the air and these two guys came down... then I was waking up in the kitchen of the Going Merry." Bibs said and flew up off of Cam's shoulder and placed herself on top of Luffy's hat.

"Is she up. She can't be still unconscious?" Zoro said.

"What makes you say that. Ia could be asleep for hours! It's only been an hour n a half." Bibs said.

"I'm gonna go look for her." Cam said and sprinted off somewhere.

"I'll look in the trees." Zoro said.

As Zoro walked into the trees, he lost sight and sound of the group.

CLONK!!!

"What the hell was that?" Zoro said, looking around. On the ground about five feet from him was a skinny guy with a broken metal baseball bat. The guy was out cold.

Zoro cocked his eyebrows and went over to the guy.

Then he felt about a thousand little needles pierce his skin. He looked around and saw thousands of little fluffy balls of bright red, pink, blue, and orange.

"...oh God... pink..." he managed to say before he keeled over onto the ground.

I-F-I-W-E-R-E-K-I-N-G-O-F-T-H-E-F-O-R-E-S-T

The group made it up half the mountain. They stopped to take a small break at the objection of Sanji.

Usopp scanned the mountain and looked up at the top of the mountain.

"GUYS! I SEE HER!" he yelled when he spotted the brunette tied to the middle pole.

"WHER IS SHE!?" Sanji yelled and pushed Usopp out of the way to see. Usopp fell to the ground, hard.

"Why'd you do that!?" he yelled, picking himself up.

Sanji didn't answer. He started walking up the rest of the mountain. Everybody followed, growling.

"Hey... I just noticed. Where's the Algae for Brains?" Bibs asked, flying around their heads as they walked up the mountain.

"Zoro? He said he was going to look in the forest. Guess he got lost."

"Idiot." Bibs said and flew up to Luffy and landed on his hat. Again.

Usopp felt around for his slingshot and found it to be back a ways on the trail.

He ran back and got it but when he straightened up, a huge rock hit him in the head.

"Got him, sir! We've got the last one! The others are on their way up!" the ugly, thin guy said into the snail.

"Good. Get him up here!" the snail yelled in a graspy voice.

T-H-E-L-O-N-G-A-N-D-W-I-N-D-I-N-G-R-O-A-D

Ia screamed as they threw Zoro up onto the ledge and followed afterward.

"What did you do to him!?" Ia yelled, actually caring. She's caring about Zoro?

"Just used a tranquilizer on him!" they said, proudly.

"HOW MANY!? Like...? A thousand!?" she yelled.

"It was only 500! Keep quiet." the first guy said as they lifted Zoro up and tied him to the pole on Ia's right.

"No. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" she screamed until the guy ran over and tied a piece of cloth around her mouth. She still continued to scream, though.

Cam, who was running around the middle of the mountain, heard her scream, and bolted it up to the top.

* * *

5-4-07 

SPIDER-MAN 3!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH


	19. Blood and Rescues

If I don't see Spider-Man, I'm gonna shoot someone.

Mugiwara: backs away

Ia: I NEEDS SPIDER-MAN!

Mugiwara: hits over the head with a metal baseball bat.

Ia: (I think she died?)

Chapter Nineteen

"IA-SWAN! I'LL SAVE YOU!" Sanji yelled as he ran up the mountain side.

Up on the mountain, they had just gotten Usopp up there.

"Excellent! As soon as the Straw Hats get here," he said and made a slashing movement across his throat.

Ia stared at him. She looked at the three woden tables that now had two poles connected to them. At the bottom was a small hole in a piece of wood and above that was a very large, sharp, steel blade.

"YOU ARE THE MOST... HORRIBLE... JERKISH... RETARD I'VE EVER MET!" Ia screamed, she had ripped the cloth with her mind.

"How did you rip the cloth?" the boss asked.

_Damn! _She thought. "Uh... it was really tight and I... NO! I chewed through it!"

"There's no teeth marks." one of the guys said, bending over to look at it. Ia then kneed him in the face and he fell back, sputtering blood. He then sneezed, spraying Ia with a whole LOT of blood.

"CRAP! NOW I LOOK LIKE I DIED!" Ia screamed, waking Zoro and Usopp.

"What the hell?" Zoro said.

"IA'S DEAD!" Usopp screamed as he was being tied up to the pole. Not really noticing it.

"YES! I mean... oh no. Ia's dead." Zoro said in a monotone.

"You sound sad." Ia said flatly.

"AHHHHH! DEAD GIRL TALKS!"

"_I'm not dead_!" Ia screeched.

"But... you're covered in blood?" Usopp said.

"Sir Nosebleedsalot sneezed on me." Ia said, glaring at the guy with the Kleenex stuck up his nose.

"Alright! Ready to be decapitated!" the Boss asked cheerfully.

"No."

"Not really."

"WHAT!? DECAPITATED!?" Usopp screamed and nearly fainted.

"Ok... I've got a question. I understand taking Zoro and me... but why'd you take Usopp?" Ia asked.

"I took the most powerful Mind, Body, and Spirit of the crew. To get revenge on Straw Hat Luffy." the Boss said angrily.

"I'm spirited? I'm a Band Member! HOW AM I NOT SPIRITED!?" Ia screamed.

"You scream a lot, don't you."

"YES I DO!" Ia screamed.

"Get them to the Guillotine." Boss said, rubbing his forehead.

T-H-E-M-U-S-I-C-O-F-T-H-E-N-I-G-H-T

The crew that was not sentenced to death ran up the path and onto the ledge

"I'M HERE TO SAVE YOU, IA-SWAN!" Sanji yelled as he reached the top.

"What about us?" Zoro and Usopp asked as they were laid down onto the guillotine and their heads put into the holes. Ia was already in her's.

"Why are you here?" Sanji said, disgusted. He was hoping for him and ONLY him to save Ia from the perils of this mountain and brigng her back to the ship and she'd kiss him and say she was wrong to dump him. That was then squandered when-

"I'LL SAVE YOU, IA-SWAN!"

A blur flew above Ia and knocked the guillotine far off the mountain. Ia sat up and screamed, "CAM!" happily. Sanji nearly exploded.

"WHAT! YOU KNOW WHO HE IS!?" he screamed as he ran over to where Ia and Cam were.

"Ya. He's my boyfriend." Ia said. Cam smirked at Sanji without Ia seeing.

"WHAT ABOUT US!?" Zoro and Usopp screamed from where they were.

"We should free them, too." Ia said but was pulled back suddenly and when they turned around to see her, she had two swords at her neck. The Boss was holding them.

"NO!" Sanji and Cam yelled and then glared at each other.

"I WILL GET MY REVENGE ON STRAW HAT LUFFY!" he screamed like a maniac and took Ia by the wrist and started running down the other mountain path behind him, Ia being half dragged behind him.

"WE GOTTA SAVE HER!" Sanji and Cam yelled and were about to start running when Zoro and Usopp screamed, "GET US OUT OF HERE FIRST!"

A-I-N-T-T-H-R-O-U-G-H-W-I-T-H-Y-O-U-Y-E-T

"Where are you dragging me?" Ia said from behind the Boss.

"The town square," he said. "For a public execution!"

"Why are you killing me?"

-meanwhile-

"Can we go now!?" Cam said hysterically, pointing to the path that the Boss took Ia down.

"We have to get Zoro and Usopp out of here first! Calm down!" Bibs yelled from Luffy's hat.

"He could've hurt Ia by now!"

"Don't worry! We'll get her back." Nami said as she let Zoro out.

"Where did he take her?" Cam yelled at one of the subordinates.

"Town Square. He said something about a Public Execution?" the subordinate said.

"OH MY GOD!" Cam and Sanji screamed. Sanji started running down the path he and the crew came up and Cam just sprinted as fast as he could off the ledge towards the city.

* * *

5-4-07 RANT AND RAVE! MDnC 


	20. Super Duper Uber Pwn3age

I can't stop writing...

Chapter Twenty (woot)

Ia and the Boss were standing at the top of the execution tower. It was about two stories tall and very wide.

"Why are we here?" Ia asked flatly. Getting really irritated.

"For the execution!" he said happily and shoving Ia forward towards the rope.

"I know that. But why are we up here?"

"I'm always up here!"

"That's disturbing." Ia said.

The guards shoved the girl with brown hair and blue eyes up to the rope and shoved her head through the hole and tightened the rope around her throat. They then put a burlap sac over her head and dropped the trapdoor.

She did the dance of death as she jerked around. Cheering was heard all around.

CRASH!!!

Cam had jumped from the mountain and ended up right behind the hung woman and in front of where the Boss was.

"Ia? SHE'S DEAD!" Cam screamed and nearly threw himself off the tower. But was caught in mid-air. "What the hell?" he said and turned around to see what was going on.

"Would you really kill yourself if I died?" Ia asked, her hand outstretched, holding on to him with her mind.

"YOU'RE ALIVE! IT'S A MIRACLE!" Cam yelled.

"I never died in the first place. Bossy here pays to be up here to watch the executions. He's demonic."

Ia brought Cam back onto the platform slowly.

"What are you gonna do to her?" Cam asked the Boss.

"Once the crew gets here, I'm gonna drown her!"

G-O-O-D-S-T-R-E-T-C-H-O-F-B-A-D-L-U-C-K

The crew sprinted into the city and into the town square where they saw up on the platform the dead girl.

"HE KILLD HER!" Sanji screamed, anger welling up inside of him. He was ready to kill the Boss with his kitchen knife.

"She's not dead." Bibs said quietly. Hoping not to get Sanji angry. He might kick her and then she'd die.

"Sh-she's not dead?" Usopp said.

"If she died, I would have been gone. Am I gone? No." Bibs said.

"Then where is she?" Sanji asked.

Usopp scanned the cround with his goggles then spotted Ia up on the tower with Cam and the Boss.

"There she is!" Usopp yelled and pointed to the tower.

"What's that?" Ia asked as she looked into the crowd. The crowd was splitting into two different sections leaving one long path down the middle which someone was running down with a few other people behind them.

Sanji appeared at the foot of the staircase and instantly kicked the Boss's hand so he then let go of Ia's wrist.

"You challenging me?" he asked, surprised.

"Yes. You threatened to kill my Ia-Swan." he said, lighting a cigaret. His eyes growing darker.

"What are you going to do to me?" the Boss asked, egging him on.

Sanji spun into a massive kick and drove the Boss off the tower and down onto the pavement below.

"H-he's dead. You killed him." Ia said.

"For you, my Ia-Swan!" he said, hugging her. Cam nearly exploded at this.

"Sanji. I could have saved myself." she said.

"But I saved you! Not him." Sanji said, pointing at Cam.

"He saved me from the Guillotine?" Ia said.

"I saved you from him! What was he going to do?"

"Drown her." the executioner said, bringing the body down from the ropes.

"I saved you from drowning!"

"I could have saved myself! I can move stuff with my mind!" she yelled.

"Ia, are you ok?" Luffy yelled as they reached the top of the stairs.

"I'm fine. Sanji killed the Boss." Ia said.

"We saw him fall down onto the pavement. Nearly fell on Chopper." Zoro said.

"Are you ok, Chopper?" Ia asked the little reindeer.

"I'm fine! I don't need your help!" he said, trying to shrug her off.

Ia shrugged and turned back to the two boys that were obsessed with her.

"Let's go back to the ship." she said and let them pass her to go down the stairs that encircled the tower.

Once they had all gone down the stairs, she ran towards the edge and dived off it. Nearing the bottom, she straightened herself up and floated to the bottom.

"That was fun!" she said as half the crowd was in total shock.

* * *

5-6-07

A really bad ending, do you think? Tell me in a review. I can't WAITE till the next chapter! Te Hee!

RANT AND RAVE!


	21. Kickball OF DEATH!

I'm board

Chapter Twenty-one

Ever since the incident involving Ia being held against her will, Sanji and Cam have been trying to win the affection of Ia. Doing stupid and pointless stuff in hopes of Ia's love.

"What are they doing?" Nami asked, walking into the kitchen where Ia was sitting at the table watching Cam and Sanji having a holding-your-breath contest.

"Breath Holding contest. This is their fifth attempt." Ia said, extremely board by the whole thing.

"How long has it been!" Nami asked urgently.

"About 20 seconds, why?" Ia asked, looking up at Nami.

"Well... Sanji's turning purple." Nami said. And, in fact, Sanji was turning a dark shade of purple.

"I've got a riddle! If you choke a Smurf, what colour does it turn?" Ia asked, all excited.

"What!?"

"A Smurf is a light blue. If you chock it, what colour does it turn?"

"CONCENTRATE ON THE ONES WHO ARE TURNING BLUE!" Nami screamed and pointed at the two non-breathing boys.

Ia turned towards them and held out her watch. Cam then let his breath out and a few seconds later, so did Sanji.

"I won! How long, Ia?" he asked. In agreement, the two boys could not call Ia Ia-Swan till she chose which one she loved.

"Thirty-three seconds." Ia said to Sanji.

"You two are pathetic." Nami said and left the room.

J-U-N-G-L-E-L-O-V-E

They stopped at an island because they needed food. It had been a week and a half since the incident. Ia hadn't been out of either Sanji or Cam's sight since. Only when she slept. But that proved wrong the second day Cam was on the ship.

Ia was laying in her bed facing the wall but she had her watch on her wrist which was near her face. It said 8:51 AM. She groaned a bit and heard heavy breathing from somewhere over her. Her eyes grew big and she knew it wasn't Nami.

The heavy breathing continued and she heard a whisper all excitedly: "Sh-she's waking up!"

Horror swept over her body. "Oh my GOD! AMANDA WAS RIGHT!" she screamed, turning over to see Cam standing next to her bed. "GET OUT! NOW!" she screamed as he ran up the ladder to the trapdoor.

Now on the island, she walked around with Cam and Sanji following behind like hopeless puppies. It would be cute if they didn't silently bicker on the way.

She walked up to a field with a huge area with no grass. It had a square rock in the center of the diamond and other rocks at the points of the diamond. There were a bunch of little kids around with a big red ball.

"What'ch ya doing?" she asked the first kid she saw. A little girl with yellow blond hair and big brown eyes.

"Playin' kickball," she said.

"Can I play?" Ia asked.

The little girl looked at the other kids and turned back to Ia and said, "Yes! You're the captain!"

"AWESOME!" Ia yelled and made the cha-ching jesture with her arm.

"They can play, too." the little girl said and pointed at Sanji and Cam.

"Alright. Is one of them gonna be a captain, too?" Ia asked.

"Ya. We want blondie!" the little girl said and threw the ball to Sanji, who kicked it way into the field.

"COOL!" some of the kids yelled and the others went to find the ball.

W-H-E-R-E-C-O-R-N-D-O-N-T-G-R-O-W

Ia had picked her team along with Sanji. Cam was on Ia's team, no surprise there.

Ia was up first and Sanji was pitching.

"Medium Bouncy!" Ia yelled to the pitcher. As in her childhood, the kicker would call out their pitch. It's only fair, she supposed.

Sanji pitched it and she ran up and kicked it hard against the ground. Best way not to get out automatically.

She managed to get to the first base and she shouted to Cam, "KICK ME HOME!" she took this too seriously.

Cam stepped up and yelled his pitch to Sanji.

Seeing as Sanji hated Cam's guts, he pitched at bit to bouncy so Cam kicked it up in the air and got out. Ia knew that would happen so she didn't move. Her green eyes scanned over her team.

A few pitches later and her team had four points. After the third out, Sanji's team was up.

"Call it." Ia yelled at Sanji, who was up first.

"Slow." he said.

Ia turned quickly and made a move back signal to her outfield.

She then turned back and pitched a slow ball to Sanji. He kicked it with full force and it landed right in front of the furthest kid back.

Sanji ran to the first base as the kid threw the ball to the kid at the second base.

Sanji ran up to the second base right as the ball came towards the kid. Sanji was forced to skid into the base.

"What's the call? Is he save or out?" the little blond girl asked.

"He's out!"

"He's safe! I saw!"

"I saw the kid get the ball right before he touched the plate!"

"I saw him touch the plate right before the kid got the ball!"

"What's the call?"

"Safe!" "Out!" "SAFE!" "OUT!"

"Ok, ok!" Ia yelled. "Let's just say he's safe, for now." Ia said.

H-O-U-N-D-D-O-G

After a while, Ia's team was up by one. 22-23. It was Sanji's team's time at kick. This last pitch declared the rest of the game. It was the little blond girl who proved as good a kicker as Sanji.

"Fast!" she said, excited.

"Ok." Ia said and signaled her team to move back.

She pitched the ball and the little girl kicked it on the ground in-between second and third base.

She sprinted to the base as the team sprinted for the ball. They grabbed the ball as she rounded first and headed towards second.

They passed the ball to the kid at second but she was already past and heading for third.

Second base sensed that she'd be at home before he could throw it to third, so he threw it at home.

The kid that was on second when the girl kicked had just hit home (23-23), the blond girl was just about to hit home when...

* * *

YOU'LL KNOW WHEN I UPDATE NEXT! MU HA HA HA HA! 5-8-07 


	22. Ia's Choice

Chapter Twenty-Two

... the ball smacked into the stomach of the kid at the home base and was blown backwards a foot and onto his butt. The little girl smacked the home plate, safe. 24-23.

"WE WON!" Sanji's team cried.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Ia screamed with all her might and sank to her knees dramatically. Her head reeling backwards.

"Are you ok, Ia-swan?" Cam asked.

Ia merely pointed at Sanji and fell to the ground.

Cam started glaring at Sanji.

The entire walk to the ship...

As he cooked supper...

As they ate supper...

And all night.

"Why is he glaring at Sanji? I mean they hate each other... but he's been doing this ever since you guys got back."

"And before. My team lost at the kickball game and I was upset. Cam's just taking it very hardly." Ia told Nami that night.

"He must really love you."

"He does!" Ia said, laying down, resting her head on her arms which were crossed on the pillow with the clouds pillow case.

"Whish I had that."

"You've got Zoro?"

"Bleh! I've got suspicions that he's still in love with Chey." Nami said, laying down as well and extinguishing the lamp.

Ia smirked to herself. For having the best boyfriend... and that Chey probably slipped Zoro a love potion.

H-O-P-E-L-E-S-S-L-Y-D-E-V-O-T-E-D-T-O-Y-O-U

The next morning...

Ia walked into the kitchen, wiping the sleep out of her eyes. Why did she get up so early? It was 9:07 AM.

"That early?" Ia asked as she sat down on the couch and tried to stay up.

"If you're tired, Ia-Swan, why don't you go back to bed?"

"I don't know? I felt like getting up." she said, and smoothed down her long cameo skirt she was wearing.

"You look lovely this morning, _my _Ia-swan!" Sanji said, bringing her over a glass of water.

"Thank you, and I'm not yours." she said and took a drink. Sanji cringed as she said that.

"What does he have that I don't?" Sanji cried, running over and landing on his knees up against Ia. She leaned back, trying to avoid him.

"I don't know?"

"He can't cook like me! He can't fight like me?" Sanji said.

"Just because you can cook and fight doesn't mean that I should like you more." Ia said, getting up and leaving the room. Before she left, though, she said, "I think it was your looks that got me." she said and went out on the deck.

T-R-U-E-F-I-N-E-L-O-V-E

Later that day, Sanji and Cam were having another challenge for Ia's love.

"What's this one about?" Ia asked, sitting on the railing looking down at them where they were from the lower deck.

"Trivia!"

"About?"

"You."

Ia's expression changed completely. "Oh! This should prove interesting!" Ia said and crossed her legs and placed her hands on her knee. She sat up straighter and flipped her shoulder length layered straight hair out of her face. Her brown eyes stared down at them and she asked, "One. I know this is obvious, but what is my favorite colour?"

"I know this one, it's blue!" Sanji said.

"No. It's red." Cam said.

"Close. It's scarlet."

"You have to be specific?" Sanji yelled.

"Yes! Now... favorite foo-"

"SHRIMP!" Sanji yelled. Cam looked devastated.

"Yes. Uh... favorite sport?"

"Swimming!" Cam yelled.

After about 51 questions, they were tied. They had both missed a question ("What's my favorite subject?" Ia asked. "Uh?" "Er?" "Idiots... HISTORY?")

Ia needed a stumper. Something not many people knew about her.

"Uh... oh God... hey... I just thought of something? Where the hell did Bibs go?" Ia asked.

"Uh?" Cam said, looking around.

"Er?" Sanji said and looked around with Cam.

"Whoever finds her gets the question!" Ia said and that made the boys run around the ship. Cam couldn't be seen and Sanji pretty much just searched in random places.

A-M-E-R-I-C-A-N-P-A-T-R-O-L

Ia sat in her room, reading _Treasure Island _when Cam and Sanji came in.

Ia looked up and asked, "Yes?"

Cam brought from behind his back the small fairy thing. Bibs was tied up with pink string with her wings tied up as well. She was sitting on Cam's hand and had a very disgruntled look on her face.

Ia picked her up and put her on the bed and started to untie her.

They stood there for about a few minutes in silence until Sanji yelled, "WHO WON!?"

Ia looked up and said, "Well who found her?"

"I did." Cam said, smirking at Sanji as he did so.

"Oh. Where was she?" Ia asked.

"Under the kitchen table. So who you gonna pick?" Cam asked.

"That was the one deciding contest?"

"Yes. We figured whoever knew the most about you got to be with you." Sanji said.

"That's sweet! I was gonna pick Cam anywa- I mean..." Ia said and looked up at the horror stricken face of Sanji.

"I'm sorry, Sanji. He did win fare and square... but..."

Sanji turned around and left the room.

C-A-N-I-T-R-U-S-T-Y-O-U-W-I-T-H-M-Y-H-E-A-R-T

Ia found Sanji in the kitchen.

"Sanji, are you ok? I'm so sorry. But you have to see it from my point of view-"

"It's ok." he said, not turning around.

"You understand that... if we're together... you live here and I live in my world. It could never ever work." She didn't try to make it sound like she hated him.

"I understand. I get it." he said, still eyeing what he was cooking.

"O-ok. Sure! Ok." Ia said, not know what TO say.

There was an awkward pause between them. The only thing that made a sound was the gentle hiss of whatever Sanji was cooking.

Ia finally left the room silently and Sanji turned around to see if she was gone. When he did, he turned back to what he was cooking, shrimp.

* * *

I think I'll end this here. Ya.

5-11-07...

RANT AND RAVE!

YELL AND SCREAM AND RANT AND RAVE, THERE'S NO USE YOU NEED TO SAYYYYYYYYYYY!

Zac: When am _I_ going to come in?

Ia: Don't worry! Just go kiss Skie, will ya?

Zac: (fumes and pouts a bit and walks off all disgruntled)

Ia: I think I'll stop now:d


	23. Ian

Have I yet decided what this chapter's gonna be about, NO! And I'm writing. Doo doo doo doo doo la la la la laaaaa!

Chapter Twenty-Three

"_I don't steal! And I don't lie! But I can feel? And I can cry- _what are you doing?" Ia yelled.

It was about a fortnight after the whole 'Pick Me!' fiasco between Sanji and Cam. During said time, Cam said he wanted Ia to die (in real life, this happened, too) and Ia will not forgive him. That made Sanji think he could get Ia back... WRONG!

"Listening to you sing!" Cam said dreamily like he was in a trance.

"You were eavesdropping," Ia said. "You're not gonna be forgiven." she added, returning to her notebook.

"Please forgive me!" he cried, going down on his knees.

"No." Ia said, without looking up.

Cam walked into the kitchen with a look of sadness mixed with annoyance.

"See, if it was me! She'd forgiven me by now!" Sanji gloated.

"But it's not you, it's me!" Cam said in retaliation. Sanji nearly threw the knife he had in his hand at him. But decided to kill Cam slowly instead of quickly.

W-H-O-S-S-O-R-R-Y-N-O-W

They stopped at an island for food for Luffy seeing as he ate more than anybody else. What else is new?

Ia managed to be by herself this time as she walked around the little village. Little did she know that somebody was about to run into her in 3... 2 BAM!!!

"What the hell?" Ia asked, looking up from where she was on the ground. She was laying on her stomach with the person who ran into her on top of her laying the other way so they made an X.

"Sorry. Running too fast! Didn't see you there!" they said. They had a sorta low voice and weren't very heavy, from what Ia could tell.

"Apology accepted, get off." she said as they lifted themselves off of her. She got up and found herself in front of a boy of about Sanji's age, if not younger. He had deep red hair which reached the tops of his ears and was shiny like all anime hair and shiny silver eyes. He was wearing a light grey tee shirt and baggy jeans. He looked like he was from Ia's world. He had a black tattoo from what Ia could see on his right upper arm. He's what Ia would say, 'HOLY GOD HOT!'.

"Oh, I'm Ian." he said, looking very nervous and glancing over his shoulder at random.

"Ok, Ian. I'm Ia." Ia said.

"THERE HE IS! GET HIM!" somebody yelled from down the road and about a hundred pirates came tearing after Ian.

"Oh God! They found me!" he yelled and grabbed Ia's wrist and bolted down the road, half dragging Ia.

"What? Who found you? Who are they?" Ia yelled as she ran with Ian.

"They're the Pirates on my dad's crew! My dad's really overprotective so I ran away. I've been out of him for about a couple weeks. They just now caught up with me! They're trying to get me to go back to my dad's ship!" he yelled.

"That's gotta suck! Here! I can help!" she said and lifted them into the air and onto a building. They sat down and peaked over the edge, hoping they wouldn't see them.

"Where'd the kid go?" one of them asked, a fat guy with a cheerful disposition and food in his mouth.

"We gotta find him or Cap'n'll have our heads." another said, this one with a long face and dark hair and a sword.

"Come on! Let's split up!" somebody yelled and they all ran in random directions.

"Whoo! Thanks! How'd you do that anyway?" Ian asked, turning over on his back and staring up at the sky.

"I ate the Devil's Fruit. Meili Meili no Mi. Mind Mind Fruit. And Eau Eau no Mi. Water Water Fruit."

"Two? God!" he said as she sat up and crossed her legs indian style.

"I'm just so special." she said sarcastically.

"You a Pirate?" he asked her.

"Ya." she said, looking at him. He continued to look at the sky and averted her gaze.

"Who's crew?"

"Straw Hat-"

"Luffy's?" he asked.

"Yes. You know him?"

"No. But my dad does! He gave him his hat!"

"Shanks? Your dad's Shanks!" Ia said in disbelief.

"Unfortunately." he said.

"Wow. Didn't know Shanks had a son." she said.

"Ah huh. Wasn't able to go with him till I was twelve. I always wanted to be a Pirate. Dad took the fun out of it, though." he said.

"I can see that." Ia said, shifting around so she faced the other side of the roof instead of Ian. She, too, looked up at the sky.

"You know him?" Ian asked, turning his head and looking at Ia.

She continued to look at the steadily darkening sky. "No." she said.

Ian had a look of confusion and turned his head back to the sky.

They were silent for a bit until she heard something zoom down below her. She looked down and saw a cloud of dust come from nowhere in a straight line.

"Cam's probably looking for me." Ia said.

"Who?"

"My boyfriend." she said as she stood up. Ian followed her.

"Oh... you have a boyfriend." he said.

"Yup! You disappointed?" she asked, looking at him.

"No. You're too young. Too immature." he said, smirking slightly.

"AH!" Ia said in what sounded like frustration, teasing Ian.

"Can we go? You know, back to your ship?"

"I don't have a ship. You mean Luffy's?" she said.

"Yes." he said.

"Alright!" she said brightly and lowered them to the ground.

B-E-S-T-O-F-I-N-T-E-N-T-I-O-N-S

"Where's Ia-chan?" Sanji asked, scanning the roads for a sign of the psycho black haired girl.

"I ooh noo?" Luffy said with food full in his mouth. Sanji walked over and smacked him in the back of the head causing him to spit it all out in it's original form.

"NO EATING TILL IA-CHAN GET'S HERE!" Sanji yelled.

"I'm hear." Ia said from the doorway with Ian.

Cam turned around to see her and saw Ian with her. "Who's that!" he snapped quickly. Eyeing Ian with hatred in his eyes.

"This is Ian. He want's to know if he can join the crew." Ia said and sat down next to Cam.

"I never said that!" he said, taking the seat inbetween her and Luffy's seat.

"You were thinking it the entire walk here!" Ia said, smiling.

"How'd you know?"

"I can read minds, too! Didn't I tell you?"

"No!" he said.

S-E-R-E-N-A-D-E

"_I could hurt someone like me. Out of spite, or jealousy! I don't steal and I don't lie- _can I help you!" Ia snapped as Ian came up to the crow's nest where Ia was, trying to write in peace.

"Do you know where my dad is?"

"Why the hell would I know that?" Ia asked as Ian climbed into the little circular box with her.

"You can read minds, can't you?"

"Depends on how far off they are. I could try, if you like?" she asked.

"Ok!"

Ia rolled her eyes and concentrated hard.

"Got anything?" Ian asked impatiently.

"No." Ia said. "All I got was Zoro thinking about my friend Chey. Luffy thinking about Meat, One Piece, and more meat. Cam AND Sanji thinking about me! No surprise there. And you, thinking about me thinking about you thinking about me!" Ia said.

"Why do you do that?" he asked, coming closer to her.

"Do what." she asked.

He didn't say anything. But started kissing her.

* * *

5-14-07

MY FIVE-MONTH-AVERSERY! Why do I always put the relationship baaaaad things on my month-averseries? Hum...

YELL AND SCREAM AND RANT AND RAVE! THERE'S NO USE YOU NEED TO SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY! MOUNTAIN DEW AND CLASSICAL MUSIC! woot woot :d


	24. Love on my Lips

Writing is like nicotine... if I don't write, my brain buzzes like mutant bees near a flower girl.

Did I just say that? AWESOME!

Mr. A told the band today that you know it's 2007 when you have to tilt your head to smile:)

Chapter Twenty-Four

And they crazy thing is... Ia started kissing back. Till her mind told her that she DID have a boyfriend.

"Woe! What are you doing?" Ia said, pushing Ian away.

Ian rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly and his face turned the colour of the inside of a watermelon.

"I told you. I have a boyfriend. Tell him and you will not have children." Ia threatened.

"Alright! I get your drift. I don't know what came over me." he said truthfully.

Ia watched him with a face of confusion mixed with slight anger till she softened. "Let's just pretend that never happened." she said.

"Yeah. Ok." he said and got out of the crow's nest.

Ia nervously chewed at her knuckle.

L-O-V-E-O-N-M-Y-L-I-P-S

Ia entered her bedroom, still chewing on her knuckle.

"What's a matter?" Nami asked, looking up from a map she had.

"Nothing!" Ia said quickly and in a high pitch.

"You sure?" Nami asked as Ia got her pajamas on.

"I'm fine!"

"Ok." Nami said and returned to her map but was cut off by Ia.

"Ok! If you must know..." she said and whispered it in Nami's ear.

"What? Why did you- he do that?!" Nami said.

"I know!" Ia said nervously. "What if he finds out?"

"You best hope he never finds out." Nami said and took a sip of her drink.

Ia then went to bed shortly after that and stayed up half the night anticipating the next day. Over in the next room, Ian was doing the very same thing.

S-U-N-S-H-I-N-E-O-F-Y-O-U-R-L-O-V-E

IAN'S POV

I went into the kitchen the next morning to find Ia already there. She looked at me and waved. Like nothing ever happened at all? True, I didn't know her much, so I didn't know if this was an act, or if this was how she reacted to most things.

I sat down and started eating my breakfast. I was sitting next to Ia again this morning.

"Morning, Ian." she said brightly. Her boyfriend's arm around her waist.

"Morning," I said. "Sleep well?"

"Not really." she said, yawning a huge yawn.

I nodded. I had a huge amout of waffles in my mouth and I didn't want to spray her with them.

She then kissed her boyfriend and left the room with her notebook.

O-N-E-L-A-S-T-S-H-O-T

We were sailing along the sea when dark clouds rolled in and a lightning storm hit.

At once, we had to get the sails up. Ia and I volunteered at once.

I had to go up and tie them up because she can't tie them up with her mind. "To small and nimble and it's wet!" she claims.

So as I was up there, she held the sails up and I tied them to the mast. As I was doing it, a bolt of lightning hit the water about a couple miles away from the ship. The winds started to pick up and soon I was holding onto the mast for dear life. On dad's ship I was never let near this high up on the mast. "Might fall!" he always said.

Ia was tying herself to the mast with a life line and trying to stand up straight.

I was suddenly still and being brought down to the deck.

"Thanks, Ia." I said.

"No problem!" she yelled, still being pelted with hail and strong wind that caused the hail to go sideways.

Once we got into the safe haven of the kitchen...

"Ia, are you alright?" Cam yelled as she came in. He immediately ran over and hugged her.

"I-i-i-i-i'm-m-m f-f-f-f-fine!" she said, clinging to him for warmth. Sanji looked as if he could choke Cam right there.

"Awe! He's so PDA." somebody said from the other side of the room.

"Who the hell are you?" Zoro yelled.

"Why are you here, Zac?" Ia and Cam said.

Standing in the corner of the room was a boy around Ia's age, maybe a bit younger, with milk chocolate brown hair and dark brown eyes. He was wearing a light blue button up shirt with a black tee shirt under it and jeans with black shoes. He also had glasses on. He was standing there with his hands behind his back and a stupid smugish grin on his face.

"What am _I _doing here?" he said mockingly.

"Yes, YOU." Ia said, walking over to him.

"I don't know? Why the hell should I know? I was just walking down the hallway with Skie-Chan because we were going to lunch and I hit my head on something? Now I'm here." he said.

"You hit... your head? You are so retarded." Ia said.

"_I hate you!" _Zac said.

"I know." Ia said.

"That's not very nice!" I yelled, trying to defend her.

"It's ok, Ian. He always says that. He just can't deal with the fact that he's shorter than me." Ia said making Zac look all flabbergasted. Did I just say that?

"YOU ARE NOT TALLER THAN ME!" Zac yelled and walked up to her and they both stood as straight as humanly possible.

"Who's taller?" Ia asked and the whole crew looked at them.

"I'd have to say they're the same height." Usopp said.

"Me too." Sanji said.

"They are." Zoro said.

"I have to agree." Nami said, standing ever so close to Zoro.

T-H-O-E-S-M-A-G-I-C-C-H-A-N-G-E-S

"Can I talk to you?" I asked Ia as she came out of her bedroom the next morning. She was wearing jeans with a big dark blue tee shirt with small yellow writing on the left side of her chest that said NHS _Pep Band_. Her hair was tossled and out of shape, I knew she wanted to brush it badly right now.

"Where's Cam?" she asked, looking around.

"Not here. He's still in bed." I said.

"Alright," she said and we went instantly to the cargo hold. "What is it?"

"I want to talk about what happened." I said.

"Ok." she said, shifting around, her arms crossed.

"I'm sorry... I kissed you. I don't know what I was doing."

She looked at me for a while. "It's ok." she said after about 30 seconds.

"Really?" I said.

"Mm hum!" she said, smiling.

"So... you hungry?"

"Yes. But I need a brush more." she said as we walked out of the cargo hold. As we left, she poked me in the back of the neck and said, "I poked you in the back of the neck!" and ran off, laughing insanely.

I think this is the begning of an odd friendship.

She's weird.

* * *

5-16-07 

Like you don't know that already. Who doesn't think I'm weird?

(several hands in the back wave) (I walk over there and shove them all into a pit of boiling pudding with little poodles that start to bite their left ears) THINK I'M NORMAL NOW?

Rant and rave? MOUNTAIN DEW AND CLASSICAL MUSIC! SWIMMING IN MOUNTAIN DEW WOULD BE SOOOO AWESOME!


	25. Where are We?

I'm all obsessed with Harry Potter... koff-again-koff...

I chose to forgive Cam for the whole thing. It's just sad to see him give me the cold shoulder. (shudders)

Cheese Nips are good :P

Chapter Twenty-Five

"I win."

"I win."

"I win."

"_I _win."

"I WIN!" (anger)

"I win." (calmness)

"What's going on?"

Zac and Ia look up from their glaring contest and their 'I win' game. Rules: 1. I win. 2. I win. 3. I win.

"I win." they said in unison. Zoro stared at them with a mix of hatred and confusion.

"Win what?" he asked.

"I win." they said again.

"...?..." was all that Zoro could do. He stared at them with just confusion now. O.o?

"Get with it, Zoro. Zac loses." she said, making Zac look very mad. "I win." she whispered.

"Oookay?" he said and walked over to the fridge to get some grog.

"I win." "I win." "I win." "I win." they continued. Zoro nearly threw the bottle at them.

"God, you are so annoying." he said, leaving.

"Ya! Well, I win!" Ia shouted after him.

F-I-G-H-T

The entire crew (minus Usopp) was on the new island they were on.

They were walking down the street when, "HEY! IT'S THAT BLOND GUY WHO KILLED BOSS! THAT'S THE CREW HE'S WITH! GET 'EM!" a guy from this huge group of huge pirates yelled. Each guy was muscular and stupid looking with tan skin from being at sea so much. They started running at the crew with their swords at hand. The crew got ready for fighting when the biggest guy took out a ginormus gun. Near the size of a cannon and started shooting cannonball sized bullets at them. Kinda like Billy Bullets (or Bullet Bills, however you'd like to call them -koff Zac koff-).

Seeing they were clearly outnumbered, they ran for their lives. Scurrying in groups of two, they ran at random directions. Ian with Ia, Zac with Zoro, Luffy with Nami, and Sanji with Cam.

"Where are we running to?" Ia yelled as the pirates chased her and Ian.

"Don't know, don't care! Just get away from them!" Ian yelled back as they ran down a dark side street with nobody in it except for the occasional drunk old bum who was sitting on the cobblestone street who merely waved slowly and happily at them as they ran past.

-c-

"Shouldn't we be fighting them?" Cam yelled as he and Sanji ran down the main street. Cam looked as if he was walking while Sanji ran as fast as he could.

"We can't take on nearly 200 of them!?" Sanji yelled.

"I can outrun them." Cam said, sorta smugly.

"You can outrun anybody!" Sanji yelled in frustration as they turned the corner and headed down a smaller, less crowded street.

-z-

"You run like a cow." Zoro said as he and Zac ran down a forest path they had veered onto as they tried to get away from the murderous pirates.

"Why are you running?" Zac persisted, trying to anger Zoro. "Shouldn't you be fighting? It seems weird that a swordsman is running away from a fight."

Zoro stared in disbelief and, of course, anger. "I'm running so I don't get slaughtered! There's too many." he said.

"Mm hum."

"I DON'T SEE YOU FIGHTING!" he screamed as he dogged a tree.

"I don't have anything to fight with." he said calmly.

-l-

"Keep running, Luffy! Keep running!" Nami yelled as she and Luffy ran down the beach.

"Why!" he whined. "I wanna fight!"

"There are too many! KEEP RUNNING!" she screamed.

-o-

Ian and Ia finally gave the guys the slip as they sneaked into the nearby forest.

"How far away from the city are we?" Ian asked.

"Really far. All I'm getting is you're thoughts." Ia said as they continued to walk around the trees.

"Go up and see if you can see anything." Ian said and Ia lifted herself up and sat on top of a rather tall palm tree. "SEE ANYTHING?"

"Tiny buildings." she yelled back.

"How far!"

She looked down and shook her head.

"Come down." he said and she jumped lightly down to the ground.

-z-

"Where's the stupid city?" Zoro yelled.

"You got us lost." Zac said. He was sitting on a stump near a pond that they found in this dense forest.

"What makes you say I got us lost?" Zoro yelled, turning around to face Zac who didn't look like he cared much.

"You always get lost. You can't not get lost." he said, tossing a rock up and down in the air.

"Why don't you try to get us out of this damn forest then!" Zoro snapped.

"Fine." Zac said and started off to his left, at a marching pace. Zoro followed unwillingly. Trying to decide wether or not to leave the kid and find his own way.

-c-

"We're lost." Cam said as Sanji looked to his left and his right.

"We'll find our way back. I just hope that my Ia-Chan's alright." Sanji said, not seeing Cam's face of pure hatred seeing as his back was turned.

"She's _MY_ girlfriend!" Cam spat at Sanji, instantly ending up right in front of Sanji's face. Sanji stared at him with a bored expression, smoking yet another cigarette.

"I know. Just wait till you leave." Sanji said and started walking down the path, his hands in his pockets.

"What do you mean?" Cam asked, jogging up to Sanji.

-o-

"We're near somebody?" Ia said as she and Ian walked around the trees. Not paying attention to where they were going. Just in the general direction of the city.

"Who are you hearing?"

"Pretty sure it's Sanji." Ia said and turned abruptly to her left, cutting off Ian.

"Where are you going? The town's that-a-way!" Ian yelled, pointing in front of him.

"Let's go this way, trust me!" Ia said, still walking.

Ian sighed and followed her.

-z-

"Cliff." Zac said as Zoro nearly fell off a 20" cliff.

"You lead me here!"

"Yeah. I know." Zac said, smiling.

"You... are worse... than Ia!" Zoro said tensely.

"I'll tell her that! She'll then probably kill you, drown you, and stab you. In that order." Zac said as he looked around.

"What are you doing." Zoro muttered as Zac spun in circles, looking for something.

"I thought I heard voices?"

-c-

"So where are we?" Cam asked, looking around.

"Nowhere near the city, that's for sure." Sanji said, throwing his cigarette butt on the ground and taking out another one.

-o-

"What the hell was that?" Ia yelled as something flew over her head, causing her to duck.

"I think it was a bird?" Ian said, helping her up. All of a sudden, a giant black bird swooped from the sky and dive-bombed the two. Ia screamed and started running, her arms over her head. Ian chased after her, his arms over his head.

"THIS BIRD'S PSYCHOTIC!" Ia screamed as they ran right into Zac and Zoro.

"What the hell?" Zoro yelled from the ground seeing as Ian and Ia had knocked them all over.

"Ia?" Zac asked.

"A BIRD'S ATTACKING US!" Ian and Ia screamed and ducked again as the ginormus black bird dive-bombed them again.

"AWESOME! YOU THOUGHT I WAS GONNA KILL YOU!" somebody screamed with laughter.

They all looked around and saw a girl a little shorter than Ia. She had blondish-auburnish hair that reached her shoulders and a grey/purple shirt with fairy wings on the back of it. She also had on a pair of jeans and pair of shoes that had on one of them a yellow bike lock.

"Chey? YOU WERE THE BIRD?!" Ia screamed and ran up to hug her Amigop.

"Yes!" she squealed.

"How'd you change into a bird? How are you here?" Zac asked. Zoro looked dumbstruck.

"I have that rare special ability! And I ran into a streetlamp pole walking home from school."

"Smooth." Ia said sarcastically, her arm around Chey's shoulders.

"Shut-up!" Chey said, laughing.

All of a sudden...

* * *

5-18-07 

Arn't I just the greatest person? Leave you hanging at the end of a very very long chapter. A very very RANDOM chapter, I'll admit. But, still. Kinda Sorry for it being just a little bit on the confusion side. :?

RANT AND RAVE OR YOU'LL DIE LIKE ZORO DID-! Oops... that wasn't suppose to leak to the public... crap! (Flees country under different name- Chris Jack John Percival Janitor maybe? Would I be... CJJPJ? Maybe JJ? CJ? Maybe just Elliot)


	26. She's a Zombie

When you send me a review, please tell me which is better. Swimming, Mountain Dew, or Swimming IN Mountain Dew. You better or I'll keep asking till you all do. I thank you (bow).

Chapter Twenty-Six

... "CHEY, I LOVE YOU!"

Ia, Ian, and Zac stared wide eyed at Zoro with shut mouths. The air was still since nobody was breathing.

"Oh my God." Ia said in amazement.

"Oh... Zoro!" Chey said, smiling. "Weren't you going with Nami?" she added, her smile fading slightly.

"I can't help it. I love you." Zoro said.

Ia's eyes kept darting back and forth between her bestest friend and Algae-For-Brains.

"You guys... why are you just sitting on the ground?" Sanji asked as he and Cam made their way into the small clearing.

"Chey's here." Ia said.

"Really? Hey, Chey!" Cam said, looking around for the Psycho-Zoro-Obsessed.

"Hey. You're here, too?"

"Yup!" Cam said and walked over to Ia, who was still on the ground with Ian.

"Can we just get back to the ship?" Zac yelled and started marching off. Ia rolled her eyes and Zac was thrown into the air, did a flip, and landed on his back.

G-R-E-A-S-E

"You got back, good." Nami said as the crew came up the beach from the trees. Luffy, Nami, Usopp and Chopper were sitting on the deck.

"Chey appeared in the forest." Ia said as she and Cam made it up the gangplank.

"Guess what, Nami! He loves me!" Chey said extremely gloatingly and snobbish. Nami looked as if she was about to strangle Zoro, or die.

She got up and went inside slowly.

"Good going, Chey." Ia said flatly and followed Nami.

"You hurt my Nami-San!" Sanji cried at Chey.

"Oh well." Chey said.

"You're heartless!" Zac said and was rewarded with a punch in the arm by Zoro.

Chey smirked.

"_I hate you_!" he hissed at Zoro, while rubbing his arm.

Bedroom...

"Chey's always loved Zoro. She can't help it if she's gloating... a lot." Ia said. She was floating with her legs crossed indian style about three feet off the floor. Nami was sitting on the couch, drying her eyes with a tissue.

"It's just... so sudden! (Sniff) I knew he was going for Chey again... but I didn't think I'd be today!" Nami sobbed.

"Can I go throw Zoro off the ship."

"Do whatever you want." Nami said, without thinking. Ia's eyes grew huge. She smiled evilly, like she was about to meet Orlando Bloom or Ja-Captain Jack Sparrow or Elliot Reid. When Nami finaly figured out what she said, Ia was gone.

T-E-A-R-S-O-N-M-Y-P-I-L-L-O-W

Ia walked onto the deck and stood about 15 feet from Zoro.

"What?" he asked.

Ia looked up at him, one eye was her normal brown, the other was emerald green.

Zoro took half a step back but was lifted into the air, and spun around till he nearly threw up. Which he did a few seconds later.

"IA, STOP!" Chey screamed from somewhere behind her, but Ia couldn't hear her. She was off it. Somewhere else. Apparently, when Nami said she could do whatever she liked to Zoro, something in her head must have been set off. A living Zombie.

Nami ran out and saw Zoro being pelted with everything in the water. Fish, seaweed, rocks, and the occasional brown boot and fishing poles.

"What is she doing!?" Nami yelled.

"KILLING ZORO!" Luffy yelled as Ia brought up two massive cylinders of water and they kept rushing into Zoro.

Nami ran up behind Ia and screamed, "STOP!"

Everything suddenly stopped and Zoro fell to the ground, unconscious, coughing up water with a mix of mud and the occasional minnow.

"What the hell?" Ia asked, looking around.

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!" Chey screamed, running up to Ia and shaking her.

Zoro then woke up. He spotted Ia and took out his swords and charged at her.

She screamed and ducked and he hit the mast with his Demon Slash.

"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" Ia screamed as she ran around the ship, trying to avoid the Swordsman who was close to killing her this time. The crew just watched. Even Cam and Sanji. Zac was rooting Zoro on.

"Why don't you just stop him with your mind?" Usopp asked as Ia ran past, Zoro hot on her tail.

"YOU THINK I HAVEN'T TRIED THAT YET!?" she screamed, as she ran past the Tangerine Grove. As Zoro ran past, his sword caught a couple of the fruits and they fell, bounced on the floor, and onto the heads of Chopper and Luffy, who ate them happily, watching the chase.

Ia ran to the port side of the ship and dived into the water, Zoro followed.

After a few seconds, Zoro popped back up.

"Uh... where's Ia?" Luffy asked, not seeing the black-haired water and mind bender.

After 30 seconds, Sanji jumped into the water.

Another minute later, he popped back up.

"Where's Ia?" Cam asked, hysterically.

"I... don't... know...?" Sanji asked as he got back up on the ship after Zoro.

Cam then stopped breathing. It took a smack on the back by Chopper to get him to breath again. He then exploded.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW WHERE SHE IS?! OF COURSE SHE'S SOMEWHERE DOWN THERE, SHE COULDN'T HAVE JUST DISAPPEARED!?" Cam screamed in Sanji's face.

"She really wasn't down there!" Sanji said.

"Where could she have gone?" Nami asked.

I-V-E-G-O-T-M-Y-E-Y-E-O-N-Y-O-U

That night, the crew was silent. For the most part.

Not many of the spoke. When they did, it wasn't more than a whisper.

"Does this happen a lot?" Ian whispered/asked Usopp.

"Not really. We tend to go missing at times. Ia's gone missing before. Last time she was here." he whispered back.

"Really? How'd you find her?" Ian whispered.

"Just by coincidence, the boat was nearby." Usopp whispered.

"How does a girl just disappear after falling into the sea?" Ian whispered.

"I wouldn't put it past Ia to get herself taken. She's pretty powerful." Usopp whispered.

"Ya. She is." Ian whispered more to himself than to Usopp.

* * *

RANT AND RAVE ABOUT HOW YOU LIKE THIS AND THE THING AT THE TOP! Yayness! 

I can not wait till the next chapter! Excelenteness!!!

5-21-07


	27. Sucker for Taffy

I'M BACK!!! I hated being in that car for the total equivalency of two days... ulgh... (shiver running down spine)

Oh, since you probably don't know, I was in Yellowstone Nat. Park on monday-Wednesday. The other days were just going to and from the park.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Ia surfaced on the shore of the town. Bone dry. She, of course, could make an air bubble down in the water; which is what she did when she fell in.

She walked into the town which let off a luminescent glow of gold from the lamp posts because the sun was setting.

Looking around, most of the little shops were closing or closed and the bars and casinos were livening up. It reminded her of Deadwood, South Dakota.

"Hello, miss! Might I be able to buy you a drink!" a guy about an inch shorter than her asked. He was a pudgy man with straw colour and texture hair. He had a bald spot and small watery eyes. He looked buzzed.

"No." Ia said forcefully.

"Come on!" he yelled, following her.

"No." Ia said again, this time a bit more forceful.

"Come on!" he said, grabbing her wrist but was blown backwards and fell on his back in the middle of a crowd. The crowd burst into laughter and pointed at him cruelly.

Ia shook her head and kept walking.

L-O-L-L-I-P-O-P-C-A-N-D-Y-M-A-N

Ia finally found a shop that wasn't closed. So she went in.

"What kind of store is this?" she asked as she went in.

"SaltWater Taffy." the man around 65 said. He had a bushy white handlebar mustache. He had a round, plump face and a kind smile.

"REALLY!" Ia cried and ran to the middle of the long store.

"Yes. All sorts of flavours. From Watermelon to Huckleberry." he said as Ia grabbed a big paper bag and started piling all she could reach into the bag.

When she was done, the bag was almost overflowing.

"You'll get cavities." he said as he rung it up.

"If I'm good enough, this'll last me the rest of the year!" she yelled as she paid him and left.

The man shook his head and pushed a small red button.

L-O-L-I-P-O-P-G-U-I-L-D

Ia returned to the ship where everybody was in the kitchen so they didn't see her arrive.

She moved down to her bedroom she shared with Nami (and now Chey) and dumped the entire contents of the bag onto her bed.

Eyes gleaming, mouth watering, she ate fiveteen pieces of Taffy when Nami and Chey came in.

"IA!" Chey cried.

"Where were you!?" Nami yelled.

"What are you eating?"

"What is that?"

"Is it good?"

"HOW DID YOU PAY FOR THAT!"

"Calm down, you guys." Ia said with a mouthful of blue raspberry, huckleberry, and peppermint saltwater taffy. "I'm fine. Just eatin taffy." she said and swallowed.

"Let me have some!" Chey said and sat down on the other side of the massive pile of flavoured sugar.

Nami shook her head and went back up to the kitchen.

When she got up there, "Nami-san? Why are you back up here? I thought you went to get some sleep?" Sanji said, very confused.

"Ia's down there eating her weight in Saltwater Taffy." Nami said disapprovingly.

"IA'S DOWN THERE!" Cam yelled and was gone in the instant.

"Where was she?" Ian asked.

"In the town." Nami said, sitting down next to Zoro, who scooted nearer to Chey.

"How'd she get there?" Zac asked.

"She can bend water as well, you dork." Ian said.

T-H-E-C-A-N-D-Y-M-A-N

The next day, Ia had her bag of Taffy on deck with her and Cam when the Candyshop guy came up onto the dock.

"Who are you?" Luffy asked, stretching down from the Crow's nest.

"I'm The Candyman." he said plainly. His bushy white mustache gleaming in the sunlight.

"You're not getting this Taffy back." Ia said forcefully, holding it in her arms.

"Oh no! It's not that. We're here to destroy you!" he said, checking his gold pocket watch.

"Oh, good! I thought you were after my Taffy-WHAT!?" she screamed.

"We? Who's we?" Zac asked, everybody coming out onto the deck now.

"My army."

As he said that, a ton of men popped out of the water and landed on the dock. They had bright red skin and brightly coloured clothing. Many pink, blues, greens, and oranges.

"Oh God." Ia said, slightly disgusted by the sight of them.

Usopp just started screaming around the ship.

"Prepare to die!"

"WAIT!" Chey, Ia, Cam, and Zac all yelled.

"What is it?" he said, annoyed.

They said nothing but shwoomed on out of there and into the ship.

"Hey!" he yelled, disappointed that he didn't catch them sooner.

"HEY!" the entire crew yelled in anger.

N-O-B-O-D-Y-S-P-E-R-F-E-C-T

"What are we going to do?" Chey asked.

"Those guys look weird." Ia said as they all hunched together in the dark room to make a plan. Or just to hide.

"We should fight!" Zac yelled.

"SHHH! What do you fight with?" Ia said to him.

"What does Chey fight with?" Zac retaliated.

"She just gets Zoro to fight for her." Cam said.

"I DO NOT!"

"SHHH!" Zac, Cam, and Ia hissed at her.

"Let's just fight." Ia said as they heard a demonic voice call out, "Oh children! Where are you!"

"We're over here!" Chey called out and the rest gave her a look of death. "Oops."

The four burst out of the room onto the deck to find the entire Straw Hat crew tied to the mast.

"Ah, crap." Ia said.

"Mu ah ah ah... ah ah!" he shouted in laughter as the army of red men advanced on the four.

* * *

Ok... if any of you are underprivileged and haven't watched Potter Puppet Pals yet, most of that was FROM Potter Puppet Pals. 6-25-07 


	28. THE END of the Candymen

Ah ha ha ha ha ha!!! Welcom back to my torture chamber -er- Fanfic!...

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Ia stared in disbelief at them, Zac looked disgusted, Cam was protecting Ia (or trying to), and Chey was staring blankly at them.

"What should we do?" Chey asked.

"Fight them!" Zac yelled.

"They look weird?" Ia said from behind Cam.

"So? They're going to kill us!" Chey yelled as she kicked one as he came closer.

"I wonder if they can swim!" Ia said evilly and flung most of them off the boat into the water where they just floated on their backs.

"Hum?" Ia thought as Zac started slicing them with Zoro's fallen katanas.

Chey had about 10 around her trying to kill her but she just kept kicking them in the legs but then aimed a bit higher where no guy wanted to be kicked. But nothing happened. She kicked one guy really hard in the leg, and her foot went right into the guys leg. Like he was made of rubber, or something.

"OH! GROSS GROSS GROSS GROSS GROSS GROSS!" she screamed, hopping around the ship, crashing into several of the strange men and getting her fist stuck in one's stomach, her elbow in one guys arm, and her other foot up to the knee in some guys shoulder down to his stomach.

Cam sprinted up behind them without them noticing and threw them off the ship.

"They're really light." he said as he took four guys and threw them off where they just floated for a bit and climbed back up.

"IA! BEHIND YOU!" Sanji screamed fromt the mast to Ia, who was standing there when a guy came up behind her and twisted her arm around behind her back.

Whining from the pain, the guy twisted her around and said, "STOP OR SHE GOES OVER!"

Everybody looked up. Cam was holding up a few guys, Zac was dicing another and Chey was still trying to get out of the four she was stuck in already.

Ia rolled her eyes but heard a horrible _**crack**_.

"HOLY -censord-!" she screamed as he pushed her to the floor but as he did so, her ankle, which was caught on some loose floorboards, twisted around and snapped.

The Candyman started laughing and everybody else, the redmen, started laughing.

Tears burned in Ia's eyes as she moved around and bit the guy in the arm and managed to take out a huge piece.

"THAT'S DISGUSTING!" Zac and Chey yelled.

Ia started chewing and smiled. "It's good!"

Cam and Zac stared at Chey yelled, "CANNIBAL!"

"No! No! They're all gummy! Like gummy bears!" Ia yelled, getting up and taking a huge piece out of the guys face. He screamed in agony and fell down dead.

"NO WONDER I'M STUCK IN YOU GUYS!" Chey screamed and took off one guys head and started chewing. Blood didn't come out, but red pop.

"That is disgusting." Zoro said as he watched the four teens eat their weight in candy.

"Ia-swan? Are you ok?" Cam asked, looking at her arm as it bent a different way.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Could you get Chopper for me, please?" she asked as she at the fingers off of the hand of a gummy man.

"Kay." he said and a second later was over untying Chopper.

"HEY! YOU CAN'T EAT MY ARMY!" The Candyman yelled.

"Apparently, we are." Chey said.

"How are you going to defeat me?" he asked.

"Can you swim?" Ia asked.

"Yes?"

"Damn." Ia muttered.

"What? Were you going to throw me into the water!" he laughed.

"Well, if you couldn't swim." Ia said arguingly.

"Hey, Zoro! Here's your swords back!" Zac yelled as he tossed three swords over to where Zoro stood, placing his bandanna on. The rest of the crew stood there too. Nami was getting her staff ready, Usopp was pulling out his sling shot, Sanji was tapping his foot, Chopper was readying his horns, and Luffy was placing his fallen hat on his head.

"W-what are you g-g-going to do t-t-to me?" he asked nervously.

A few short minutes later, The Candyman was flying through the air away from the Going Merry.

Ia, Cam, Chey, and Zac were sitting on the railing, massaging their stomachs when Luffy's stretched out leg came from around and pushed them all into the water below.

To Ia's confusion, they hit ground fairly quickly. The water didn't taste salty and it smelled very familiar.

She stood up and found that the water only reached her shoulders. It was nice and warm while the wind was blistering cold. She cleared her eyes and opened them to see Chey, Zac, and Cam all standing.

"Um... where's the ship?" Chey asked, looking around.

Ia looked behind her and saw not a ship, but lights, off in the distance.

"Where are we?" Zac asked.

It was nighttime and there were orange lights off in the distance. Behind them were trees and over a ways was a bluff with faded graffiti on it that said (or was suppose to say) Sweed.

"Looks like Negaunee." Ia said as she walked towards shore, shivering as she touched the cold night air and 50 mph wind.

"I can't be." Cam said.

"It is." Ia said when she heard, way off in the distance, a log truck and a speeding motorcycle with it's engin revving.

"I wonder what day it is?" Zac said when they reached shore.

H-Y-M-N-T-O-T-H-E-S-E-A

Sanji ran over to the edge where he saw them all fall and expected to see them all floating there.

"Where are they?" Sanji yelled.

"They're not there?" Luffy asked.

"YES!" Sanji yelled angrily.

"Chey's gone!" Zoro yelled in frustration.

"So is Ia-chan!" Sanji yelled and sat on the railing and looked down to see the half heart necklace. "Ia's necklace." Sanji whispered and pocketed it.

O-N-E-L-A-S-T-S-H-O-T

As they were trying to navigate their way through the dark and muddy trails sopping wet, and in Ia's case, muddy (she had slid down the hill that was covered in mud puddles), Cam noticed something wrong.

"Ia, wheres the necklace?"

"What necklace?" she asked as he helped her along. She was managing to step in every mud hole.

"The other half of the one I gave you!" he yelled.

Ia's hand instantly grabbed hers which was hanging from her neck.

"You're missing yours?" she asked. "It might be back in the lake- we'll look later!" she said as he was about to turn around and go back for it.

"You're right." he said as they started climbing a hill.

Ia just nodded as she tripped in, yet another, mud puddle. To make thigs worse, it started to pour.

"This probably's not gonna get any worse." Ia shivered as they kept walking.

* * *

I-T-S-N-O-T-O-V-E-R...

* * *

There... I ENDED IT! Now, the third and last one probably wont come on till maybe late August, early September? I have yet to write a beginning that I like. Well, I hoped you like it and YOU BETTER REVIEW! Please? Well... there you go... 

Happy B-Day Cam, 6-28-07 D


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